It felt like the perfect storm.
The charity I work for called an all-staff meeting to break the news: the finances we required and expected to have weren’t coming. Multiple donors — all at the same time — needed to pull out. They didn’t have the money to donate to us this year.
I was confident God would provide. God always provides, doesn’t He? My team prayed and fasted. We confessed and repented. We lamented. We hoped. We took communion together. I went to bed each night and awoke each morning full of faith that the money would show up.
I started checking my mailbox regularly just in case a surprise check was arriving. We received prophetic words that the finances would be coming soon. I kept my eyes open for how God might wow us this time. But as the days and weeks went by, and the provision I was praying for didn’t appear, I could feel my faith beginning to falter.
What happens when the provision you’re praying for doesn’t seem to come when and how you need it?
The discouragement set in. On a morning when our team spirits felt particularly low, I decided to buy a colleague a coffee, just to brighten her day and remind her to keep going. (Coffee makes everything slightly more doable, doesn’t it?)
When I got to the line at the drive-through, I felt God’s Spirit inviting me to pay for the person behind me. I didn’t want to. My personal finances didn’t necessarily feel tight, but when everything else is shrinking in front of you, there’s a temptation to get stingy.
I rolled down my window and asked the barista if I could cover the person behind me.
“Sure you can!” But then, a few seconds later, he told me that person had already paid.
I laughed, and asked if I could pay for the person behind them.
He checked, and then said that person had used their app and already gotten a free drink.
I laughed again, a bit bewildered. “Let’s try this one more time. How about the person behind them?”
“You wouldn’t believe this… but they already paid too. And there’s no one behind them.”
He handed me the coffees for me and my coworker. I thanked him and drove off.
Had I heard from the Holy Spirit correctly? I prayed as I drove away. God, why would You ask me to pay if no one needed their coffee paid for today?
Immediately, I heard His still, small voice in response: I wanted to see if your heart would remain generous, even when the temptation is to get stingy.
It stopped me in my tracks. Tears filled my eyes as I considered the invitation the Lord had just offered me.
What happens when the provision you’re praying for doesn’t seem to come when and how you need it? I think the answer is twofold: don’t stop praying, but also don’t stop being generous.
It was such a simple invitation, but it changed everything for me. When things don’t unfold the way I want them to, I so easily harden my heart. I lose faith. I close my fists and get stingy. But what if Jesus’s invitation is to do the opposite? To remain open-handed and generous, even when you can’t see how or when the provision is coming?
God is not stingy or close-handed. He is a generous God who gives us everything – His own breath… even His own Son.
I’m reminded that we don’t follow Jesus in order for Him to give us exactly what we want, when and how we want it.
We follow Jesus because He is God, generous and open-handed who gives and gives and gives – more than you or I can ever imagine.
How could we not be generous too?
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We are learning that tho it is often taught that “He gives & therefore we are to give” more often it is “we give & then He gives” and what He gives cannot be measured in dollars and cents.
That is so true, Sharon. Thank you!
You cannot imagine how helpful and relevant this is for me. Thank you.
I am so thankful to hear this Madeline!
Love this reminder! Great message to start my day Thank you Aliza \0/
You are so welcome, Janet 🙂
This was a great message. On Saturday 11/30 I was moving and everyone that promised to help just no-showed. I cried. I prayed. Then I decided to take action and see what I could do because the move had to occur and it was approaching 2pm. I contacted the first place and no luck. I tried not to worry. First caller gave me a recommendation that I tried and it worked. Within an hour I had two movers. But I found the movers to be rude, disrespectful, nasty and irresponsible when it came to my preferences. At payment time I was so frustrated but for some reason I gave a really generous tip that they didn’t earn. I have been battling scarcity vs abundant mindset each day when I do my affirmations. I have a tendency to be stingy because I fear not having when I need it. I was so grateful that they helped me in a pinch but the service was poor.
I’m so sorry that happened to you, Shak. The scarcity vs abundant mindset can be hard, but I really do find it helpful to remember just how abundant and generous Jesus is to me. Praying you know that today!
Thank you Aliza for sharing this story of when you went to Starbucks and wanted to pay for the person behind you! This was gold to me ! God bless you for being so open and real!
With so much appreciation,
Valery Johnston
Thank you so much Valery!
Aliza,
I pray the funding for your charity came through generously too!
Sending you Advent JOY,
Lisa Wilt
Aliza, thank you so much. This blessed me so much today. I was at my fourth doctors visit in a week today and one doctors appointment went long which meant I was going to have to unexpectedly wait for 90 mins at the next doctors office. I didn’t have my laptop to do work and was extremely distraught. I decided to go read the lasted incourage post and after I read today’s I looked at the others at the bottom. The tile of this post spoke exactly to how I was feeling. After I read your post, I felt convicted to not just sit and wait but to ask the coffee orders of the admin team. Instead of waiting and sulking, I was able to go get them coffee and donuts and write them thank you cards. Walking in there, I sure didn’t feel grateful, however the act of service changed my attitude and perspective. I so know God wanted to see that shift in my heart posture, so THANK YOU for sharing your story of obedience and being a light. It’s already been multiplied.
Aliza,
It can be easy when finances are low to get “Stingy. You’re afraid the money won’t be there when you need it most. I’m reminded of the Biblical story of widow of Zarephath , her son & Elijah. She had little but when Elijah asks for bread she is scared. She goes ahead & bakes the bread. Her 1 jug of flour & oil did not run out. God is telling us not to be stingy. Luke 3 Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”
Blessings 🙂