“See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!”
1 John 3:1 NIV
I love traveling. I love airports too. Flying, though? I hate flying. See, I’m overweight. And while that fact is always present in my thoughts, never am I more aware of my extra pounds than when I fly.
I hate flying because I take up too much space.
If I have the choice, I always choose an aisle seat. I hold my breath and suck in my gut and pray that the seatbelt will latch. And then I spend the next few hours squeezing my legs together and digging my elbows into my sides as I try to avoid taking up any extra space — in the aisle, in the seats, in the air.
My scrunched-up and sucked-in body language, along with my apologetic glances and occasional “sorrys” after the inevitable bumps and elbow rubs, is one big apology.
I’m sorry for taking up too much space.
I’m sorry for being too big.
I’m sorry for being in the way.
I’m sorry I’m kind of sweaty from speed-walking to the gate.
I’m sorry I reached over you to turn on my fan.
I’m sorry my leg bumped your leg.
I’m sorry I’m in the way.
I’m sorry you have to sit by me.
Maybe you fit just fine in an airplane seat. Maybe it’s something else that makes you hunch your shoulders and stare at the ground with red cheeks, apologizing for part of who you are, for just being yourself.
Are you clumsy? Perpetually late? Awkward? Too talkative? Too loud? Too quiet? Too sarcastic? Too much? Too real? Too you?
No, you aren’t. You are wonderful. You are loved.
And when God looks at His creation (that’s you! and me!), He says, “It is very good.” Regardless of how anyone else sees us, we are God’s workmanship and masterpiece — and He lavishes His love on us.
If you’re tempted to apologize for who you are or how you are, please don’t. Remember that you have a right to be here, to take up space — in a conversation, on the airplane, in the grocery store aisle, at the moms group, in the world. And no matter how much space you take up or how you take up that space, you are welcome and wanted and loved.
Thank You, Lord, for being a safe place where I am called good, where I take up just the right amount of space, where I am seen and loved and welcome to be who I am, how I am, just as I am. Even saying that calms my heart and lets me breathe deeper. Give me the strength to truly recognize that no matter how anyone else sees me, I am God’s workmanship and masterpiece, and I am loved. Amen.
Written by Mary Carver, as published in Take Heart:100 Devotions to Seeing God When Life’s Not Okay
Our devotional, Take Heart: 100 Devotions to Seeing God When Life’s Not Okay, is full of stories like this. Women sharing from the depths of their experience, pain, and eventual hope as they struggled through times when life was not okay.
We know that for many of us, life isn’t okay right now, which is why we see each story in this book as an offering of faith, from one heart to another.
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YOU are loved!
I am loved- even if I am too loud and pushy and opinionated….all those other things!
What a vunerable post. It is exactly how I feel often- too much. Also not enough in some ways. Leaning into being who God made me to be helps so much with both perspectives. Thanks!!
Thank You Mary C
For This Quote & Sharing Your Thoughts & Experiences!
See what great love the Father has lavished on us,
that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!”
1 John 3:1 NIV
Appreciate Your Reminder That We Are Children of God
& We Are Loved !
You are beautiful…… I follow your writings and appreciate the honesty and reality of your life that you share in them. You will never know how many women have read today’s post and helped them realize they are not alone….. not alone in being overweight, not alone in feeling looked-down upon or thought less of because you don’t fit the image of the latest jeans ad. You are so right: God sees you for who you are, not your dress size. God knows your beauty inside and out…..you, beautiful Mary, are His servant in whom He is well pleased. He created you to spread His love…..and you are doing a wonderful job. Thank you for being so brave to write about topics that hit so close to home. We are all blessed by them.
This devotion was truly interesting as I experience something similar every day, here in the Senior Living Facility. There are about 75 people here and many of them do not like the way I dress. They say nasty things as I walk across the dining room to our table and thankfully I have no hearing loss so I do hear everything they say. I do have some people that like to see what I wear every day. When I moved here almost 2 years ago, these comments really hurt me. I didn’t want to explain why I dress the way I do, but truth to be told, I was a manager for 35 years in a very large company and they liked that we dressed so we looked like a person of some authority, but that was so any of our many employees knew that if they had a problem or wanted to talk to me, they knew I was the one and I never let them down. Of course, the longer I was there the more they knew I was there for them. I loved that job. Helping people is one of my favorite things to do. Back to today, finally I realized that I don’t have to explain why I wear what I do. As God said….”I am what I am.” So am I and I needn’t feel odd because I dress professionally. God created me and this is the way He likes me and that is all that counts with me. We should always be proud of who we are as we have been created by God as part of the plan, He has for us. Thank you for reminding me of this and you made me smile this morning and that is good as I am struggling with so many serious things. Love the (in)courage women’s community. I read their words right after I get dressed, I go to my community…………………..Betsy Basile
Mary,
Your devotional writing is exquisite and touches thousands… Thank You.
Sending you fall joy,
Lisa
I stinkin’ love you Mary!!!! You are one of my FAVE people!!!! You are truly wonderful and loved my friend!!!
This blessed me so much! I struggled for so long to be heard because I was told early in life that what I said or thought was not meant to be shared. My voice should not be used. But He whom the Son sets free, is free indeed, so today I walk in the liberty that there is room for my voice in this big wide world the Father created!