Roughly 15 years ago, I was standing in a tiny hallway having a conversation with a group of young girls. That conversation led to the heartbreaking realization that these girls expected their lives to be mediocre at best. They were missing out on the abundant life Jesus had for them. I went home and inquired of the Lord about how I could help. That year, the Virtue curriculum was born in my heart.

Since that encounter, the curriculum has transformed into life groups and book clubs across the country. Later, it became a conference and, finally, the book Virtue: Living Uncommon in a Common World. Together with a group of ten incredible ladies who make up the Virtue team, we share the message of living an uncommon life around the world — showing how it leads to life to the fullest, even a “happily ever after.”

These ladies have become “iron sharpens iron” friends to me (Proverbs 27:17). They remind me of one of the most powerful stories of friendship in Scripture, found in Luke 5.

“Some men took a man who was not able to move his body to Jesus. He was carried on a bed. They looked for a way to take the man into the house where Jesus was. But they could not find a way to take him in because of so many people. They made a hole in the roof over where Jesus stood. Then they let the bed with the sick man on it down before Jesus.”
(Luke 5:18–19 NLV)

The man on the mat couldn’t walk. He wasn’t capable of seeking his healing on his own, and his friends refused to let him remain stuck. Their plan was clear: get him to Jesus. But when they arrived, the house was packed. A crowd blocked the door.

I can’t imagine being among the people who saw a paralyzed man being carried and yet didn’t make room for him to get to Jesus. It seems so selfish. Surely they knew why those men were there! Yet no one moved. No one helped. They simply stood there, likely waiting for their own miracle.

But the four friends didn’t let the obstacle stop them. They climbed onto the roof, carried their friend still on the mat, tore open the roof, and lowered him directly in front of Jesus.

“When Jesus saw their faith, He said to the man, ‘Friend, your sins are forgiven.’”
(Luke 5:20 NLV)

And then, to silence the critics and prove His authority:

“’So that you may know the Son of Man has the right and the power on earth to forgive sins,’ He said to the man who could not move his body, ‘I say to you, get up. Take your bed and go to your home.’ At once the sick man got up in front of them. He took his bed and went to his home thanking God.”
(Luke 5:24–25 NLV)

This is one of the most beautiful and powerful stories of friendship I’ve ever read in the Bible—or even heard about in life. This is what friends are supposed to do. We are meant to carry each other to Jesus when one of us is not capable of getting there alone.

This doesn’t always look like carrying someone who is physically lame. A friend might be “stuck on their mat” because of a broken marriage, crippling fear, overwhelming anxiety, or sickness that feels impossible to overcome. Jesus is the answer to it all. His Word still offers healing and forgiveness today, just like He did for the man on the mat.

When our friends are in pain, it’s not enough to just sympathize. Complaining alongside them or offering pity won’t bring breakthrough. What helps is carrying them — pointing them to Jesus, lifting them in prayer, and speaking God’s Word over their situation. “The effectual, fervent prayer of a righteous person has great power and wonderful results” (James 5:16, paraphrased).

Like the four men in Luke 5, we must refuse to take no for an answer. We must be the friends who find a way, no matter the obstacles, because we know the Healer — and we love our friends too much to give up.

That’s exactly what my Virtue team girls do. They pray. They carry each other. When one of their daughters had an accident, they stood in prayer until healing came. They’ve believed together for restored marriages, financial provision, job opportunities, prodigal children returning to Jesus, and courage and strength for weary parents. Again and again, they’ve carried one another to Jesus.

I’m so thankful to be surrounded by such amazing women.

We all need these “iron sharpens iron” friends. And we all need to be them. Life wasn’t meant to be lived alone. If you’re feeling alone today, take a bold step: seek out a church with life groups or serve teams and join one. Open your home to start a book club or gather a group of women hungry to grow in faith and friendship.

Be the kind of friend who carries others to Jesus — and you’ll find yourself carried in your own time of need.

Listen to Tyra’s devotion here or wherever you stream podcasts!

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