I love the excitement of a beginning — the kind where you set out on a path of a new job, a new adventure, or a new relationship. These are the moments that we capture on our mobile phones and post to Instagram.
But here’s the thing about exciting beginnings: unexpected challenges sometimes derail them. Somewhere along the way, your heart might get trampled and doubts creep in. You feel alone, bewildered, and you start questioning everything you had put your hopes in. (Those moments rarely make the highlight reels.)
Someone out there knows what I’m talking about. Someone knows what it’s like to experience doubt. Maybe you’re doubting yourself today.
Or maybe — just maybe — you’re doubting God.
If that’s you, you’re not alone.
Stop for a moment and consider the story in Matthew 28:16-20. In it, the disciples went to a mountain because the Risen Jesus had invited them there. Keep in mind, by this point, Jesus had already wrecked His own funeral — in the best way possible. Jesus had proven Himself capable of conquering everything, even death.
And His friends had witnessed it all.
They had every reason to believe with their whole hearts. And this mountain moment with Jesus seemed like the perfect place for a victory party. In many ways, it was. “When they saw him, they worshipped him…” (Matthew 28:17 NIV).
But hold up. Here comes a startling detail in the same verse: “… but some doubted.”
Let that sink in for a moment. Jesus – alive, resurrected, standing before their very eyes – was right there with them. And still, some doubted.
They were at the threshold of their own greatest beginning – the moment they’d be sent to take the gospel to the ends of the earth — but their faith was super shaky.
The Greek verb Matthew used for “doubted” is distazo, which conveys a sense of wavering or uncertainty, not outright disbelief. Imagine the doubters saying, “Dude, I just don’t know. I am struggling to wrap my mind around this.”
Does that sound familiar? Maybe your doubt has looked like hesitation, like wavering. You believe in God, but you’ve had a hard time wrapping your mind around what He’s up to.
Friend, stay on the mountain with Jesus. Show up to worship Him anyway, even when your faith feels fragile.
To me, this detail in Matthew 28 affirms the authenticity of the Scripture. Matthew could have conveniently left out those three words – “but some doubted” – because they could have embarrassed his buddies. Yet he kept them in, because they were true. The fact is, some doubted.
Just because you struggle with doubt — no matter how deep that doubt goes — doesn’t mean that Jesus will leave you. He won’t. That’s not His style at all.
Jesus didn’t send the doubters packing. He didn’t abandon them. He didn’t rebuke them. Instead, Jesus offered reassurance to the whole crew:
“And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age” (Matthew 28:20 NIV).
I need that reminder from Scripture; in my out-of-the-blue trials that threaten to derail my faith, I need to know that Jesus hasn’t abandoned me.
Instead of rebuking us for our doubts, Jesus reassures us, just as He reassured the disciples: “I am with you always.”
Jesus is with you in this – whatever your “this” is. He is with you to the end. He knows every heartbreak, every betrayal, every disappointment. And He won’t make you carry it by yourself. God didn’t bring you this far to leave you now. When your faith wavers, Jesus is standing with you. Always.
Struggling with a wavering faith? Check out Jennifer’s guided journal, Stuff I’d Only Tell God.
Thank you for your words today. I so much appreciated the words of Jesus. I needed to hear them this morning.
Doubt is discouraging and sometimes overwhelming. Jesus said, I am with you always. That is what touched my heart this morning.
I fall and I doubt but He loves me. That is Agape Love. And that is so encouraging. Thank you.
I feel buoyed by Jesus’ promise, too. I need to know that He truly is always with me, with us.
I truly needed to read, believe, and eat off every word written in this devotional. I live in the DMV area, very close to DC and the devastating blows democracy is taking makes me waver in faith. I need God to answer my prayers as I pray for our country. I am relieved to know I am not the only person with doubts. It feeds my hopes in Jesus Christ. I will stay the course in my prayers. In my faith, I believe that He will help our federal gov workforce, keep SS payments in place, and turn funding back on for cancer research and the victims of Sept 11th. He will help us.
Angela,
I do hear your fears, doubts, and your commitment to praying for our nation as a fellow believer. Please know I have never known this forum to be an appropriate place to bring political issues to the discussion. I appreciate you receiving these words with the respect intended, as I understand each person is impacted in different ways. I pray God comforts you in your concerns.
Blessings,
Kathleen
Kathleen, Appreciate you being here, too!
Our country, our world, is experiencing a time that has some people rejoicing, and others grieving. My hope is that all of us — no matter where we stand politically — would move from the standing position, to the kneeling position, where we would seek Jesus’ direction, and where we would model both His boldness and His humility. I appreciate you, Angela. You are welcome here.
Jennifer,
Thank you for your devotional today!
Sending you joy,
Lisa Wilt
So glad this spoke to you, Lisa.
Oh what a timely word! I needed this reminder today. Thank you, Jennifer. It’s funny, I’ve been telling myself the past couple weeks, “Jesus didn’t bring me this far to abandon me.” Even when that doubt creeps in, I know this to be true.
Thanks for sharing that reminder, Katharine, that Jesus doesn’t abandon us!