I sat on the edge of my dad’s bed. I was eager to tell him a story – just like I’d done since I was a little girl. Dad always loved a good story, a deep conversation, or an interesting discussion about anything at all, really. (There’s a reason we called him Philosophical Phil.)
As I talked to Dad, I could see his trademark smile beneath his oxygen mask, and the way his smile crinkled his eyes at the edges.
There’s my Dad, I thought to myself. He’s still in there.
His grip on my hand wasn’t as firm as it once was, but he held my hand all the same – just like he’d done since I was a child on our Sunday morning walks to church. His eyes were open, and I could tell he was trying to fully comprehend what I had to say.
But when it came time for Dad to respond, his words weren’t stringing together like they once did – and it was clear that they probably never would again, until heaven. That broke my heart into a million pieces, because I realized that I’d likely had my last meaningful conversation with Dad here on earth.
Later that day, I went on a walk, crying with each step. Then, I remembered how Dad had lived his whole life with optimism and gratitude, even on the hardest days. He truly was the kind of man who could manage a legit smile underneath an oxygen mask.
Don’t get me wrong: Dad knew the power of lament. He was not afraid of tears or grief. But thankfulness was a consistent part of his character, and he wanted his kids to live that way too — even on our hardest days, especially on our hardest days.
I confess to you that on hard days, my first reaction isn’t to feel thankful.
On hard days, you’d more likely find me trying to pray my way out of the struggle.
But the truth of the matter is, hard days can turn into hard seasons, no matter how much we pray. So the question becomes, “Will I praise Him anyway?”
I want to be the kind of person who, even at my lowest:
– Refuses to allow circumstances to dictate my life or my praise.
– Understands that God’s love is above anything that can happen to me or the people I love.
– Knows that God is worthy of praise, always.
I’m thankful that the Bible shows us how.
Remember King Jehoshaphat? He had a vast army coming against him. Instead of freaking out, he sought the Lord through prayer and fasting. That’s a pretty wise first move when faced with a trial of such magnitude.
And then he waited. He listened. And he heard from the Lord.
God told him to appoint singers to go ahead of the army, praising God. Take that in for a minute. God didn’t say to send chariots, warriors, or marksmen. The order: Send SINGERS.
“Jehoshaphat appointed men to sing to the Lord and to praise him for the splendor of his holiness as they went out at the head of the army, saying:
‘Give thanks to the Lord,
for his love endures forever.’”
2 Chronicles 20:21 NIV
I love how their song of praise didn’t start after the victory, but before it.
When we sense a battle ahead of us, we can do the same. We can pray, fast, seek God’s guidance, and yes, even sing in the face of our enemies.
What does your enemy look like today? Maybe, it’s a conflict at work, a broken relationship, some disappointing news, or the death of someone you love. Maybe you’re under a full-scale spiritual attack right now. If so, sing. Praise God with all of your might. The devil cannot stand to be in the same room as your praise.
That day, during my walk, I recommitted myself to praise God, no matter what. That’s the way my dad taught me to live. More importantly, that’s the way our Heavenly Father teaches all of us to live. When we are met with misery, we can outmatch it with a melody.
My dad traded his earthly residence for a heavenly one a few weeks after that moment at his bedside, leaving a legacy of praise. And for as long as I live, I want to be the kind of daughter who lifts her face to the heavens to say, “No matter what I’m going through, God, I will praise You anyway.”
Check out Jennifer’s journal, Stuff I’d Only Tell God, to put gratitude into practice.
Madeline says
Jennifer, this was so comforting and helpful. I usually end the day with a list of gratitude but I think I might start my day being thankful and praising God. It would certainly set a more positive tone for the day.
Jennifer Dukes Lee says
Maybe we could book-end our days with praise — some at the beginning, and some at the end!
Marcella says
Good morning,
I will praise the Lord with song and cymbals. Psalms 150:3-6.
Thank you for sharing your story of your dear father and the legacy he left you. Your message encouraged me today.
Blessings!
Jennifer Dukes Lee says
I love knowing that this encouraged you. So glad you’re here today. Have a fabulous week!
Susen says
One of my goals is to be able to live joyfully regardless of my circumstance. I’m not quite there yet BUT I’m closer than I was yesterday. Thank you for sharing your experience with your Dad, and what he’s taught you, and what you’re sharing with your part of the world!
God Bless!
Jennifer Dukes Lee says
I am so blessed to have the Dad (and Mom) that I have. Thanks so much for being here today. xo
Barbara Nicholson says
Awesome! Thank you.
Jennifer Dukes Lee says
You’re welcome, Barbara!
Twyla Franz says
What a legacy your dad left! My husband and I attended a celebration of life service last weekend for a man your dad would have loved to meet—one who smiled big and loved bigger and praised God until the very end of his cancer-shortened life. Nevertheless praise—how it moves God and changes us!
Jennifer Dukes Lee says
Sounds very much like someone my Dad would have loved to meet! In heaven, perhaps they’ll cross paths!
Gail says
I love this so much! What a legacy your father gave you! I’m in the midst of my own health crisis right now. After 7 weeks I was finally well enough to go to worship yesterday, and it felt so good to sing praises to our God with my brothers and sisters in the Lord. I resolve to continue to praise Him even in the midst of my pain and weakness.
Jennifer Dukes Lee says
I love that, Gail. I am so sorry you are going through a health crisis, and also I am inspired by your persistence in praising God anyway.
Betsy Basile says
Dear Jennifer…What a great story and unbelieveable it is to me as yesterday this is what I was fighting with myself about. I went to church and prayed most of the day, but I have so many very difficult situations staring at me, that if I can push one out of my mind, there is always something else I need to face. I do praise God for everything He has given me over the years. The one is truly a Miracle. I had just had a 9+ hour serious operation and then the doctor gave me some medication and I coded. They shoved my husband out and most of the rest I only know because he told me. I ended up in ICU in a drug induced coma for 2 weeks, but the doctor told Jim, he did not think I would survive. Here is what I experienced while in the coma. I actually saw Jesus and my Holy spirit was there with me too. Jesus said to me ” Betsy, you need to fight. This is not your time. You have so much to give to others right now. My Holy Spirit whispered also to fight and they would help me. ” Well, as you can tell, I did survive that, but I guess many people may never experience this or maybe they don’t remember. When they brought me out of the coma, everything looked white to me and I was very confused, but finally I started to recover and went home. I was so weak and all that I saw and heard in my coma kept going through my mind and I realized that it did really happen and at that time, I praised the Lord, Jesus and my Holy Spirit. I do praise them frequently, but I am now 77 years old and fear that these very serious things that I am still facing will not be solved before I leave this Earth. My father was quite like yous. He suffered from cancer and kept telling me while he still could, not to be afraid as he wasn’t, but like you my heart was broken in a million pieces when he left even though I knew he was sure to be in a better place, Jennifer I want to thank you for your story and I will read and re-read it as I think it will help me to face these other family problems. In the facility that I live in on Saturday mornings, we have a prayer, share and care service and this Saturday, the whole meeting will be singing songs that we have loved for many years and we actually have a piano player this week. Doesn’t this just fit into your story? It is amazing what you (in)courage women seem to peek into our minds and give us your story that is so similar. I send my prayers, love and a big hug (if I may) to you and a pray that your week goes well. Your story really touched my heart………Betsy Basile
Debbie says
Beautiful and needed!
Beth Williams says
Jennifer,
So sorry for the loss of your beloved dad. This post reminds me of Micah Tyler’s song “Praise the Lord”. Here is the chorus:
I’m gonna sing it I’m gonna shout it I’m gonna lift my hands and praise No matter what is gonna come my way
All You’ve done for me I give You the glory From the valley to the victory I know my God is gonna fight for me
So when the devil come try to get me Gonna praise the Lord When the devil come try to get me Gonna praise the Lord.
I love this song because it speaks of praising God in the highs and lows of life. I practice that daily.
Blessings 🙂