I had a very bad fourth grade teacher.
I transferred from the elementary school I’d attended my entire little life and moved to a new school in the middle of the school year. This school was an academically advanced school, and in the first week, it was apparent I was completely in over my head.
I hadn’t learned any of the math at my last school that everyone in this class had mastered. Mrs. B proclaimed to the rest of the class, “No, we can’t move on because Kathi hasn’t mastered the basics yet.” It was humiliating to be called out in front of the whole class, and at the same time being told we, as a class of thirty-two students, couldn’t move on to the next math book because I wasn’t “getting it.”
Mrs. B called my mom in for a conference to tell her I should probably not be in her class and should be put in a remedial class or go back to third grade.
I was no star student at my last school, but I had held my own and read about every book in the library. So when Mrs. B used words like “stupid,” my mom wasn’t standing for it. Mom insisted I get standardized testing. Mrs. B wouldn’t send in the request for it, so my normally just-go-along mom made a beeline to the principal to insist I get tested.
The results? I was given ways to get caught up in math. Plus, I was sent to the extra program for “gifted and talented” students. It wasn’t that I couldn’t learn; I just hadn’t been given the opportunity — yet.
Mrs. B. continued to resent my presence in her class. And my mom continued to fight for me on every front so I would not be labeled (by myself or others) because of one bad teacher.
When it was time for my little brother to be placed in the same class, my mom was having none of that. She grabbed her sleeping bag and camped out in a long line at the new elementary school to make sure my brother would get a slot. The sleeping bag ploy worked. The same year I graduated from elementary school, my brother transferred, and our family never had to deal with Mrs. B ever again.
Oh, the things we will do when we are desperate.
Those actions — taking her case to the principal, insisting on getting me tested, and camping out overnight in front of an elementary school — remind me that sometimes we need to take extreme action to get extreme results.
My mom’s actions told me I was worth fighting for — that my little child heart and mind were worth protecting from someone who was probably going through her own stuff but wasn’t emotionally trustworthy with the soul of a child.
My mom reminds me of my favorite woman in the Bible — the bleeding woman.
As Jesus was on his way, the crowds almost crushed him. And a woman was there who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years, but no one could heal her. She came up behind him and touched the edge of his cloak, and immediately her bleeding stopped.
Luke 8:42-44 (NIV)
Why is she my favorite? Because she took desperate actions and advocated for her own life.
Other parts of the gospel say the woman with the issue of blood had spent all her money on doctors and healers.
She had been bleeding for years.
She had been sick for years.
She was out of time.
She was out of money.
She was out of energy.
And this desperate woman needed a miracle.
So she did what would have been unthinkable (especially in her time) and literally pushed people out of the way to be able to touch the hem of Jesus’ garment.
There are times when we try everything we know to do. We try the polite way. We try the socially acceptable way. And then, like my mom and the bleeding woman, there are times when we need to do the not socially acceptable thing, to push other things out of the way.
And, like the bleeding woman, often it’s time to run straight to Jesus.
When it comes to advocating for my own health, for the well-being of the people I love, I need to be less concerned with the temporary, perceived comfort of others and be more focused on the heart of Christ in all things.
Sometimes, when all our other options are taken away, we have to be that woman who clings to Jesus, in front of everyone else, beyond all reason.
Desperate looks different for all of us. For some of us, it means taking your case to the principal or camping out in front of a school overnight. For others, it’s putting aside what society thinks is the right way to do things and pushing others out of the way and going straight to the hem of Jesus.
This brought tears to my eyes! In grade three I had a teacher also a Mrs. B. Who accused me of something horrible and made me stand in front of the whole class to humiliate me. English as my second language and only in Canada for a year and a half. Finally! A girl had the courage and proved who the two girls were that did a terrible thing!
Antonia – I’m so sorry for the scars that were left by that encounter, and I am also glad that someone showed up for you. Thank you for sharing this. Most teachers are gifts -then there are the people who shouldn’t be around kids in any form.
What a great post. Thank you for sharing your story and inspiring other to step forward with faith.
Isabella – Thank you for being an encouragement to me today!
Kathi, I enjoy your true stories! I also read Girlfriends in God & enjoy when you are the author. I also had a rough time in school. My last name was Wiener & as you can see so many kids, mostly boys would make fun of me. No one ever stood up for me & I hated going to public school. I was raised Jewish & that was another route that these mean boys would use along with other kids. I still remember the names of the 4 boys who totally made my life miserable since I was 5 years old. Life as a child can be so devastating to us going into adulthood. When I was 16 I became a Christian not looking for God but He came to me with the good news from a camp counsellor.
When i moved to the Central Coast of California & we went to church I would always try to hide I had a Jewish background because I was afraid of the harassment again. But there was a dear friend who embraced me & made me feel so special because of my heritage. Because of all I went thru I try so hard to really encourage others & this was actually my word thru encourage word of the year test. Lord bless you Kathi in all you do & know that you are so special in God’s eyes!
Barbara,
Thank you for sharing your story. When I got married to my husband, I told my future step-daughter, “I cannot wait to become a Lipp” and she said, “Just be glad you weren’t named after a body part in Junior High School”. I can’t imagine what you went through as a child, but I love the compassion and encouragement it has produced in you today.
Kathi, I love this article. This beautiful glimpse of your mom explains why YOU are such an advocate for others. Thank you so much for sharing.
Agreed!! xoxo
What a beautiful thing to say. Thank you my friend.
This is so great. Thank you. There are times we need to be bold about what’s right and KNOW for sure God is with us. This is so beautiful.
Ariel – YES! I pray I have the discernment to know when those times are, and the Holy Spirit strength to step up.
Yes! Thank you, friend. May we care more about the hope and healing Jesus offers us than the discomfort if causing to recieve it!
Becky – what a beautiful way to put it. I love that.
Kathi
Kathi thank you sharing from your heart. I feel for you when at school all those years ago. I know it has stuck with you. I remember my Late Mum and Dad taking me out of the Primary School. I was in for the last to years and sending me to a school they thought I would do better in. Which had smaller Classes. Plus it used to be an all boys school that was now accepting girls as well. I had a learning disability. So I found school hard. That is why my Late Mum and Dad thought I benefit from going to this school that was starting to accept Girls with smaller Classes. From the moment I went to it I never liked it. I was bullied in it for not joining in game because I didn’t want to. It was horrible. My Dad went to see the Headmaster. To see him about. His answer was I don’t see it. So I can’t do anything to stop. He did the Headmaster then did nothing. I was glad when the two years at that school were over. I was sent to a Secondary School I fell in love with. Didn’t have many friends in either. But I did love the Scripture Union in the school. That is were I knew I loved all things Christian. Nothing of the world. My late Mum and Dad still alive today not saved. So I don’t know if I will see my Mum in Glory when my time up on earth. But did when I was small sent me Sunday School. That I am thankful for. As I learnt so much then and a the kids Bible songs stick with me today. All it until I got Saved. Taught me to forgive. Not have any hate and I did a few years ago pray and God to help me forgive the kids at the school I was bullied at. Never liked. Today what happened to me then has taught me to do what Jesus would want me to do today. That is hold not to hate anyone. Love them even they are horrible to me. Even the at the age I am now. Just pray for them. Keep living my life in front of them for Jesus. Don’t let what they do get to me or annoy me. But remember Jesus see’s what they do. If they don’t saved and repent for their wrong. Jesus will deal with them. So that is what I do. But Jesus has told me when to speak in love if someone is doing something not nice to me. But say it in the Love of Jesus to them. What you are doing is not nice. It hurt but I will pray for you. I am stronger for all of this. I am being the person Jesus wants me to be. Living my life for Jesus. That is all that matters. Love Dawn Ferguson-Little in my prayers all you incourage. Thank you for sharing all you do. I learn to much from you. I love everyone you in Christ my sister’s. Xx
Kathi,
Life is super hard down here these days. So many changes coming at us all the time. The one constant is Jesus. In the midst of these trying times the best thing one can do is cling really hard to Jesus. This world needs more of God, His light & love. I’m one of those people who doesn’t care about being socially responsible. So I will tell/show Jesus’s love in front of everyone beyond all reason. Call me crazy but I’m doing what it takes to get through these times & wanting others to know my secret.
Blessings 🙂
This is such beautiful writing. You kept my attention the whole time because I’ve been that “camp-out-in-front-of-the-elementary” parent where I knew my child deserved better treatment. It wasn’t often but I’ve done it. Both with adults and even with their friends. But nothing is better than having direction as we run to Jesus and reach out in desperation for the hem of His garment and then feel His power come over us. And know that Jesus is with us and knows us just like He knew someone touched His hem. Some days I feel desperate in just my own little world and I need to remember…..don’t give up; just run to Jesus and touch the hem of the garment. Thank you for such a wonderful reminder.
I heard a pastor say years ago, “without a test, there is no testimony.” His statement reminds me that at any moment God could intervene in my difficulty and provide a miracle. In your case, Kathi, your mother was the miracle! God used her to pave the way to a very different future for you and your brother than otherwise would have unfolded!
Wow, this is such a powerful story and teaching friend. I’m asking Jesus in what ways He wants me to be bold like your mama. love you.
As a mother l tend to be polite, go with the flow but l do remember doing the same with a Coach – history teacher who humiliated my son in front entire class. He told him, l don’t appreciate your ,4th grade humor. Well, it was 9th grade my son was smart not a athlete. So this young coach didn’t know who l was, well I waited. Then two years later in Board meeting with Board members their wives we were interviewing him for Head Coach of football. Guess what l spoke up. Never regretted that moment he did not get the job. One of two times l made a stand. He didn’t care about the students like my son only jocks but once he figured out who l was he suddenly tried to be nice to my son and me. But, it was too late, damage done. My son suffers from anxiety and depression so l have to advocate for him. Mama bear is mild mannered polite Southern woman but don’t mess with my family. Former teacher so l give teacher benefit of doubt and grace but actions do have consequences. Coach moved to public school in Tampa so best for all involved. So sounds like your Mom did stand up when it counted. Blessings, Hope my kids feel that way about us. Great tribute to being a parent who is present and involved in their kids lives.
Hello!
Thank you for yet another
Testimony of our Journey
With Jesus!
God Bless!
Love & Hugs
Sandy
Clinging to Jesus beyond all reason… I needed this. I am a big fan of you and your mom, though I admit I underestimated your mom’s spunk! Thank you for all the ways you’ve encouraged me to advocate for myself and for others and for always pointing me to Jesus! Love you!
Thank you, Kathi! I never desire to be in such a desperate place, yet when I think about the times I felt closest to God, truly satisfied deep within my soul, it is during times where I’m clinging to Him in this way. So, while I don’t desire desperation, I do deeply desire the closeness with God. I sometimes ask Him, “Can You help me learn to cling that tightly without trauma or tragedy?”
This is how I feel with both of my adult daughters addicted to alcohol and one also to drugs. They are functioning addicts but it breaks my heart to see them make these choices. I have entreated, shared scripture, snippets of these devotionals when I just can’t keep those words to myself, and implored heaven for years with no visible results. I am putting my hope and trust in Jesus to save them and deliver them from the enemy but I, too, feel so desperate! I would appreciate anyone who would be willing to pray with me for my beautiful daughters Lauren and Lindsey. Thank you for your words of encouragement! I needed this today!
This is so powerful. I learned this the hard way, but I did learn it. I was just telling my granddaughter yesterday that this is the kind of mom/person she is and therefore her children can trust and count on her. Thank you for sharing.