When my late husband Ericlee and I were newlyweds, we invited my Grandpa Frank to come live with us. Several years earlier my Grandma Cora had soared to heaven, and our family knew it wasn’t good for Grandpa to be living alone anymore — far from most of our family.
My generous husband offered up our guest room. He knew this was important to me. Of course, neither of us realized that providing a home for Grandpa would enlarge our hearts in ways we’d never dreamed.
While most of our twenty-something friends were going out on Friday nights, we spent evenings around the table with Grandpa sharing bowls of pinakbet stew or taking him to theater productions and movies.
My ninety-year-old grandpa was a bit of a character. Grandpa walked with a signature slow shuffle and a toothy smile a mile wide. The wrinkles on his face danced when he talked. He told outrageous stories and got into things he wasn’t supposed to. He also had a beautiful way of disarming strangers and making them into fast friends.
In that season, my husband and I cultivated heaps of patience and experienced much surprising joy. My grandpa taught us to slow down our pace, to savor every bite, and to count each day as a gift.
When I first read the reports several weeks ago that Asian American senior citizens were being attacked in our country, I felt my chest tighten. Xenophobia and anti-Asian racism has been on the rise in the U.S. since the start of the coronavirus pandemic in March 2020. A restaurant in my own city hung a sign on its door warning people to stay at a distance until the “Kung Flu” was over.
Many of my Asian American friends started speaking out against this injustice, but I felt paralyzed. The tears were caught in the back of my throat as I thought about my precious Filipino-Chinese-Polynesian grandparents and someone singling them out because of the color of their skin, the shape of their eyes, or their perceived country of origin.
I remember my own anxiety last spring about my Chinese-American husband going out for morning runs in the neighborhood or to the post office.
Would someone say something or do something to him?
My heart had to go there. More and more reports popped up on social media of friends who were enduring racial slurs and even physical harm because people were connecting COVID-19 with China and taking it out on Asian Americans of all different cultural backgrounds.
Genesis 1:27 reminds us that humans were created as image bearers of God: “So God created human beings in his own image. In the image of God he created them; male and female he created them” (NLT).
This does not make us into gods. This means we are valued as God’s special creation. As image bearers, we can reflect God’s glory to the world in ways no other part of creation can. God deeply values us, and we have the opportunity to value other human beings of all sizes, shapes, heights, weights, personality types, and skin tones.
My flourishing depends on the flourishing of my brothers and sisters, my neighbors, family, and friends. If someone lashes out against a Black sister because of the color of her skin, we all suffer. If someone treats a Latina sister as “less than,” we all hurt. If someone overlooks an Indigenous sister, we all miss out. If someone attacks an Asian American elder, we all grieve because an image bearer of God has been struck down.
When racism is expressed in the world, we all need to be affected. Racism does not just affect individuals; it affects all communities. We are created as interdependent beings. We cannot flourish in isolation. We can only flourish together in community.
According to the Bible, we are called to pay particular attention to the oppressed, the marginalized, and those who are suffering. Jesus modeled this again and again in His ministry. He went out of His way to talk to, stand up for, heal, and champion the women and men who were most vulnerable in society. We are called to do the same.
In Romans, Paul writes about the marks of a true Christian: “Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor” (Romans 12:9-10, ESV).
Paul calls out the Romans and all of us reading God’s Word today to love each other as if we are family. Our love is to be genuine and honoring.
When my grandpa lived with us, we often went on evening walks together. He would grip my hand tightly to steady his body. For decades, the sweat of his brow and the work of his carpenter hands carried and provided for our family. Now my husband and I had the honor of caring and providing for him in his final season of life.
As we strolled the neighborhood, I had the opportunity to be his eyes — watching for cars, looking out for tree roots and cracks in the sidewalk that might trip him up or harm him. It was a privilege to walk with him in this way. On the route, he also gifted me wisdom, stories, and laughter.
Friends, let’s keep each other’s best interest in mind and value each other as part of our extended family.
Let’s stand up and speak up when we see others from God’s family being devalued or harmed.
Let’s walk together and treat each person like an image bearer of God to be treasured.
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Some of my (in)courage sisters and storytellers joined me last summer for a two-part conversation about race and racism. These personal stories from women of color in our community help shed light and give deeper understanding of these issues.
Watch here:
Andrea says
Thank you for the reminder to treat one another as the extended family that we are. Jesus saw the marginalized and mistreated and did not look away, but leaned in. May we love one another well and deeply.
Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young says
I’m journeying with you, Andrea! Thank you for resonating with me today. Your comments mean so much!
Ann Woleben says
I can imagine the joy your grandfather received from the love and care that you and your husband shared with him. What a blessing for the three of you! The racial tension in our society is appalling. I pray for peace every day.
Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young says
Ann, I experienced so much joy in that season! Thank you for your prayers for peace. It means so much!
Maura Michael says
No words to describe how my heart feels right now.
Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young says
Sometimes it’s good to just sit and now have words. May God meet you in that place today!
connie ker says
An ex Viet Nam Veteran wrote about his favorite TV show “Mash”. A wounded soldier who needed surgery told the medical people he wanted the “right blood”, meaning white blood. So to teach this soldier who was a racist, Hawkeye and Pierce darkened his feet, hands, and face so when he awoke, he would think he got the “wrong blood”. The young soldier was later told we are all of one blood, coming from one Man and one Woman. He repented for his hatred. This isn’t exactly a female comment, but we all should realize we all have red blood and lineage from Adam and Eve.
Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young says
Thanks for sharing that episode. It’s a good reminder that God created us all as one extended family!
Irene says
Well spoken, Dorina! Thank you for these thoughtful and thought provoking words.
Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young says
Irene, I appreciate your encouragement today!
Madeline says
It really breaks my heart how people treat each other.
Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young says
My heart is grieving with you, my friend! Thanks for taking time to comment. It means so much to me!
Dawn Ferguson-Little says
It breaks my heart how people can be rascis. Yet when in Hospital if ill. They don’t care what colour sink the Doctor or Nurse has as long as they make them well. Get to go home again. When we look at Jesus especially if we are saved. Jesus taught us to love people of all walks of life. No matter what skin color they have. Like the song I was taught at Sunday School when small. It is”Jesus Loves all the Children of the World Red and Yellow Black and White”. How true that is. We are to do the same. As especially if saved show the Love of Jesus to all people and Children. No matter who they are. Live as Jesus did when alive on Earth. As old Follower of Jesus said who is now in Glory. If nothing good to say about anyone. Don’t gossip Pray. Do talk about other people coming into your country from other parts of the world. Pray for them. As that is what Jesus would want you to do. She this person also said remember this Bidden or not Bidden God is watching. That is so true. Those words stay with me today. As God sees everything we do and say. We if true Followers of Jesus. We want to please him. As one day we will give an account for everything we do and say to him. So in this world let’s be people who spread the love of Jesus every where we go. So especially the unsaved see Jesus shinning from us. Thank you for another excellent reading. Love you all incourage. Love Dawn Ferguson-Little xx
Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young says
Thank you, Dawn. It’s so true. We are tasked with loving people from all different backgrounds. And our flourishing depends on it!
Nancy Ruegg says
I do not understand how Americans can blame their countrymen (and women) for something that started thousands of miles away. It makes NO sense. I pray for courage among us Christians to “stand up and speak up when we see others from God’s family being devalued or harmed.” We cannot let the lowest common denominator dominate our society!
Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young says
Agreed, Nancy. Thank you for your comments & prayers!
Theresa Boedeker says
What a lovely story. Yes, we are all connected. When one of us is hurt, we all hurt. And when we hurt others, we hurt ourself. We need to teach and learn better ways to survive. It isn’t by hurting others, but instead loving others.
Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young says
Yes, Theresa. I’m with you on that. We all need to do better.
Beth Williams says
Dorina,
You were so loving & giving to care for grandpa. I cared for both my elderly parents. You learn a lot from them. God taught me patience, persistence & grew my faith & trust muscles. I cringe when I see how far our country has gone. We were founded on Christian principles. It is a shame that we are still prejudiced over skin color or race. We, namely Christians, need to take a stand against this racial injustice. This world & our country especially needs to see more of God’s love. Let’s try hard to shower our neighborhoods, cities, etc. with a ton of God’s loving kindness.
Blessings 🙂
Dorina says
Yes, we have an opportunity to embody Christ’s love daily!
Joyce DeWitt says
What a beautiful story about slowing down and honoring our elders. I’m recalling a time I was beaten up by several black girls because I was white when I was going to high school. The only person who stood up for me was a black young man who was a Jehovah’s Witness (who had also experienced discrimination). I pray that we stand up for one another – regardless faith tradition or skin color – against injustice. The fundamental truth about Christianity is that we don’t scapegoat others because Jesus has atoned *for all of our sins*. Thank you for sharing.