The first half of 2020 has played like the opening lines from a Tale of Two Cities: “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.”
It’s easy to put a finger on the “worst of times.” Bleeding headlines are daily realities for many, but all of us have been impacted on some level. There’s not even a need to rehash the particulars because we’re already so intimately, and sometimes painfully, acquainted.
But what about “the best of times”? How could I suggest such a possibility in the midst of societal, political, economic, cultural, pandemical, and even ecumenical upheaval? In my lifetime, I have never seen our country – or the Church – so battered and bruised, so grievously divided.
If that was where this story ends, it’d be heartbreaking and reason to despair. So, I mean it with everything in me when I say, Thank God, this isn’t the end of our story. I sense we’re in the depths of tectonic shift, and when everything feels uncertain, we need to remind each other what is true: God is still God, and He is always and only good. Thankfully, He remains in control, and not only in an abstract, future sense, but now, in our present world too.
I make a claim in For All Who Wander that explains, in part, why I’m convinced we’re living in the best of times despite the chaos and brokenness: There is no greater evidence of God at work in the world than a changed mind that leads to a changed life.
In this season, I see evidence of God at work in our world because minds are changing. Lives are changing.
Our longing for a better world reveals our desperate need for God. Never have I been more grateful for (in)courage as a companion to my faith. Every essay conveys a powerful and encouraging message of hope, light, and love, pointing to the only Truth that can disperse darkness.
Over the past several years, (in)courage has made a concerted effort to add writers of color. We’ve had the joy of getting to know them through their words here, and I’ve observed how deeply each contributor loves Jesus and cares about you, our precious readers. I’ve seen these women labor over their words to bring glory to God, encouraging and equipping the body while providing invaluable insight.
We tell diverse stories because we’re informed by our unique experiences, but our goal is always the same: to speak truth in love (Ephesians 4:15). Our words are lasers pointing to Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith (Hebrews 12:2 NKJV). We know that He alone is our Hope.
Not one of us claims to “know it all.” We earnestly desire to learn from one another – iron sharpening iron – in order to grow in our faith. We offer our words as a well-worn pair of shoes, so that for a moment, you can walk around in them and see a world so different from your own through a different set of eyes.
We can learn something important, unexpected, and beautiful when we listen with open hearts and ears. But this can only happen when we lay down personal agenda, let go of a need to be “right,” and beg the Holy Spirit to renew and transform our minds, bringing conviction when necessary.
Sometimes we’ll actually realize long-held beliefs or practices are wrong or harmful even when we sincerely didn’t mean it that way. Our intentions really don’t matter; repenting and following the Lord’s leading do.
Like years ago, when I genuinely meant something as a compliment and said to Anthony, a member of a Bible study my husband and I attended early in our marriage:
“When I look at you, I don’t see color.”
As you might conclude, he was a person with skin color different from my own.
For years I used this phrase as a sincere attempt to extol the “virtue” of colorblindness. I thought this was the right way to express equality between white people and people of color. It was a way of suggesting I wasn’t a racist and that I saw people the way God sees them.
I didn’t yet know what I didn’t know, and it certainly hadn’t occurred to me how that the phrase was hurtful. I can’t say whether someone corrected my misguided ideology or the Holy Spirit brought enlightenment, but eventually, thankfully, I realized I was wrong and eliminated it from my vocabulary.
This was all a distant memory until I recently joined a peaceful protest following George Floyd’s death. Among an ocean of signs, a bright green one stood out, a list of familiar hashtags filling its page. The eighth one down was an unexpected trigger. It said #GODDOESNOTSEECOLOR, and I wondered how my Black sisters and brothers felt when they read it. I wanted to tap the well-meaning marcher on her shoulder and help her understand the hurtfulness of that phrase because God sees and values every color.
Like me so long ago, she didn’t yet know what she didn’t know. This may even be the first time you’re noticing the distinction, and there is absolutely no shame in that. We’re learners!
Ecclesiastes 3:7 tells us there’s a time to be silent and a time to speak. Being silent doesn’t equal passivity when we’re listening. Silence allows space to learn (if we’re not being knee-jerk defensive) and for the Holy Spirit to do deep heart work.
Discovering you’re wrong about a thing can be a catalyst for transformation, and admitting it to yourself is a courageous first step in the right direction.
Bravo to the ones who are brave enough to really listen to another’s point of view and to truly reconsider long-held beliefs or ideologies. May we be women of courage who aren’t afraid to pivot.
[bctt tweet=”Discovering you’re wrong about a thing can be a catalyst for transformation, and admitting it to yourself is a courageous first step in the right direction. -@robindance:” username=”incourage”]
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Bev @ Walking Well With God says
Robin,
Isn’t it so like God to use the rubble caused by war and choosing up sides to build new bridges? I do believe that God is using these times to draw hearts that have been closed, skeptical, and set in their ways, unto Himself. I know that He is performing surgery on my heart to erradicate any lingering anger, piousness, or judgment that is hidden away from view. Lately, much of my Bible reading has been resounding with this truth: God loves a humble and contrite heart. Psalm 51:17. It takes a humble heart to attempt to look at a situation from someone else’s perspective and then to admit that perhaps you’ve been wrong (even if it was well intentioned). My biggest takeaway from yesterday was the pure grace and humility with which Patricia answered every comment – even those that came on flaming arrows. Praying that God will keep drawing our hearts toward unity (the best of times) during this time of division (the worst of times). God, keep working on our unyielding hearts….
Blessings,
Bev xx
Robin Dance says
Bev…
SO well said, friend! God is at work, of that I’m certain, but sometimes it’s hard to see His perspective. I guess that’s not always for us to know (His mysteries…). A friend reminded me of this scripture this morning, one that speaks to “secret things”–
The secret things belong to the Lord our God, but the things that are revealed belong to us and to our children forever, that we may do all the words of this law. Deuteronomy 29:29 ESV
And, gracious, yes! Patricia was Jesus with skin on yesterday! I read…and learned…and my very heart was challenged, longing to be more like Jesus because of what I glimpsed in her responses!
xoxo
Linda S says
Thanks to both of you for words that are tender & kind this morning. Yesterday’s posts were difficult to read, I’m referring to the reactions to Patricia’s posts. She did model grace & humility, like our Savior. As I said in my reply yesterday, Micah 6:8 & James 2:13 (mercy triumphs over judgment), should be what we ALL strive for. In the name of Jesus!
Robin Dance says
Linda,
Yes–may mercy be near and judgment be reserved for our Holy God. Oh, that we would ALWAYS lead with love!
Mary O'Connor says
So true! Thank you!
Robin Dance says
Thank you for reading today, Mary. 🙂
~ Robin
Dawn Ferguson-Little says
We sometimes don’t like to admit we are wrong when we are wrong. It was me I think that done it. Sometimes if we can get away with we just say nothing. It seems easier that way. Like I don’t know if was me or my Husband hit a button on the security on the internet to up grade to something we never use. That meant paying more money for it. We both never get the value out of it. So it could have been me or him that hit the button to up grade the security by mistake. But it probably was me. As my Husband knows very little about the internet. The security we have for it very very safe enough for us both for all we do on it. So what a Job we had to get through to our internet providers to get them to understand we didn’t want the up grade as we never us any of it and getting them to take it of and put us back to old one we had that does up for all the security and internet we need. Was Hassel. So my Husband had the explanation of it to do saying his name on the account he had to amiy he was wrong and get it taken of. But it was not that simple. As they for age didn’t understand stand him. So it probably was my fault. I probably by accident pressed a button by mistake that I shouldn’t have. We got it sorted after they understood him. But it taught me something. We have to sometime admit we are wrong when we are wrong. If we don’t know we are wrong both of us admit we are wrong. Even to God and those we love. Say sorry. Go them say we will not do it again say we will try be more careful ask God to forgive us. Help us not do it again. Go to God in prayer. Sometimes it not that easy. As the people we love that we have to admit we are were wrong too. Might take a lot long to come round. Especially if only one of us that has done wrong. Depending on what we done wrong. To forgive us. But if saved they will. But we have to learn from it. I was scared for yeasterdy for the hik up as I thought if they say now you hit the up grade button even if you hit by mistake. Your going to have to still pay for the security up grade even if you not use it or need it. We can’t take it of until you need to see about your internet package when it up in a years time. But God was good that didn’t happen. But took along time yeasterdy for internet providers to understand what we didn’t want to pay for as we never use it. We had to admit we hit the button by mistake and only wanted the basics. But we thank God we admit out mistakes. Sometimes it best to be honest. God see everything we do. Love today’s reading Robin. Love Dawn Ferguson-Little xxx
Robin Dance says
Whew! Glad you got that all sorted out, Dawn. Goodness.
Irene says
Robin, hear, hear! Well said, faithful servant! Opening our hearts to change, that’s the key to these times. Thank you for writing these words.
Robin Dance says
Irene,
Change is constant, but it’s not always easy, is it? I don’t want my mind so open I’ll fall for “anything,” but I want it to be so open I always fall to God. 🙂 A lovely default, yes?
Theresa Boedeker says
Well said. The path of a Christian is learning and growing. Remaining humble enough to admit we are wrong and then make steps towards changing.
Robin Dance says
Theresa,
Humility…easier said than done, but the posture required to learn. It’s something I pray for….
Camilla Hubbard says
Thank you so much for your thoughtful post today. It was so relaxing to read, just what was needed. My family used to say Oh Mum thinks she’s always right. And I did! Well, nearly always. From my point of view, anyway! But I have learned along the way, Our Lord has been teaching me, and I am still learning. And yes, as others have mentioned, we are not to judge, (that is God’s job, and God’s right.) But still we fail, and do, so often. So keeping an open mind and an open heart are so important.
As I mentioned yesterday, Bob Goff’s book (Love) “Everybody, Always.” So when we do, and whatever we do for one another, we could be loving Jesus. I wish I could ALWAYS love everybody, always. Not perfect yet, but aiming. Blessings to you all.
Robin Dance says
Yes! Loving ALWAYS is our call! That we would be a people known by our LOVE and not judgment? What a powerful thought.
Beth Williams says
Robin,
God can use anyone & anything to get our attention. He is constantly working in us to change our hearts, souls, minds & thinking. Most people long for a better world. One without any discrimination, hatred or disunity. For that to happen we must all be willing to listen-really listen with open hearts & minds. Hearing things from others’ perspective without judging or judgmental thought. We must also be willing to accept & be the catalyst for change. There must be humble & contrite hearts that want God’s will for this world. Ecclesiastes 3 talks about a time for everything=especially mending, be quiet, speak, love & hate. Each has its place & time. Now we need to lament our prejudices, fix our eyes & hearts on Jesus & pray hard. Everyone should think before they speak. Making sure their words aren’t offensive or hurtful. The best thing one can do is admit when you’re wrong & take steps to learn the truth. No one seems to be taking the time to get to know other people-blacks, Asians, Indians, etc. Really take the time to listen & seek out the real person-the one God created. He created ALL people & loves us all equally.
Blessings 🙂
Margo Stretch says
Our pastor described the pandemic time as a pandemic of fear. While I see his point, I’ve identified that what has tipped the scales for me into a full-blown season of anxiety trouble, seemed more of a pandemic of conflict. As a ‘highly sensitive person’ who absorbs more than many around me, I became internally and physiologically so in turmoil due to the conflict and growing divisiveness around me, in my own little world, my own church’s FB group, and the whole world. Especially on social media, of which I’m very minimally a part (I just joined our church’s FB group to try to stay connected during quarantine…) Anyway, as my son (who is a pastor) rightly helped me see, a ‘pandemic of conflict’ has been birthed out of the fear in most everyone. So it’s a pandemic of both. Many process or react to the fear they feel by fighting, and a lot of that is rooted in the ‘need’ to be right. I’ve literally withdrawn from the spaces of conflict in attempted self-preservation for the most part, while seeking better equilibrium in my mental health. One thing has become so clear within me, and that is that I am becoming more okay all the time with NOT being right, not claiming to be right, not pretending to know enough to take that stance, because: the ONLY one who can take the stance of complete rightness, seeing the entire Big Picture of history and humanity, is God Himself. I’ve struggled much of my life with wanting to have the last word and prove rightness (especially in my most precious human relationship, my husband of 35 years); I feel encouraged that m-a-y-b-e God’s spirit is growing good fruit in me, in that I’m unclenching my fingers from around that polarizing habit of proving ‘rightness’, which is antithesis to relationship / bridge building. I’m not saying there aren’t things that are not-negotiable, but in these very complex times, there’s just so much to be gained by setting aside our own agendas and gently approaching one another in humility, grace, and other-focus. Preferring one another in sacrificial love (please, especially in the Church!). Considering that there are so many ways to view things, and nobody comes with a purely un-skewed view. I realize we need to have healthy discourse, but I believe we have a lot to learn and steps to take to approach that possibility in our messy society at this time. Thank you Robin, I appreciated your post, just wanted to comment since the ‘being right’ bit feels very personally relevant.