Hers was the first familiar face I saw in the sea of unknown that was the airport atrium. Standing back on the soil of my “home” for the first time in a year, I felt uprooted. A week before, my friend only existed as a voice over the phone while I ached for community I hadn’t been able to build yet in my new life in South Asia. America felt like another reality altogether as change pulled me further away.
But a family crisis had yanked me up by my transplanted roots, and there I stood again. Home yet not home. My husband and children stayed behind 8,500 miles away, and my heart was torn between two continents.
I expected to feel out of place after the prolonged absence and adjustment to a new normal. Yet in the smiling face of the friend who had known the depths of my wandering heart for twenty-three years, I felt like no time had passed at all. We became friends over bus rides to band competitions and passing notes in biology class. We saw each other through crushes and crushed hearts, marriage and divorce, chronic illness, and now two international moves. We had shared a house and shared over half our lives.
I had imagined our connection dissolving with time and distance as I complained that I had no friends in my new home. I focused on what I didn’t have and forgot what I did have because it lingered out of sight. Yet there she was with a caramel macchiato she knew to be my favorite in hand. She was a visual reminder that friendship is not erased by time apart and not changed by miles traveled.
When I walked into the ICU waiting room where my whole family was gathered, she quietly melted into the background. She let me cry with my sister, whose husband had just undergone a second emergency surgery for the aneurism that had prompted my unplanned trip around the world. I felt ashamed at my own lack of willingness to be inconvenienced for others when her husband didn’t complain that it was 2am before we pulled into my parents’ driveway.
I was reminded of so much more than the strength of a childhood friendship in those days. Every time she showed up over those two weeks, I was surprised when I shouldn’t have been. Where else but in the everyday needs of life should we expect Christ to show up? When she bounced my sister’s four children on her knees, battled the rain to meet me for breakfast, and brought groceries so I could shuttle the kids to daycare, I remembered the way the early church shared everything they had in common.
When she cooked for two days so we could have a makeshift early Thanksgiving dinner in the hospital before I left, I knew that this was really a Eucharist meal. What better way to remember Jesus than in caring for others? What better way to bring His body into our midst than feasting together in desperate times, remembering His presence in even the darkest places?
When she dropped me back off at the airport, there was a different feeling to this goodbye than others we’d shared before. We said somehow it felt like we’d see each other the next day instead of months later. I think it was because we remembered how truly intertwined the lives of those who live out the call to be the Body of Christ are. Nothing can separate us from the love of God or from one another. We belong to each other.
“See you tomorrow,” we said as we smiled to keep back the tears. I tucked my boarding pass away in my backpack, next to the new assurance that I’d never been without community. I carried with me the truth that we are grafted into a global and eternal family. No matter where we go, we’ll always find ourselves simultaneously home and not yet home. But we can always know we’ll never walk alone.
Nothing can separate us from the love of God or from one another. We belong to each other. - @NicoleTWalters: Click To Tweet Leave a Comment
Oh, Nicole, it’s so good to know that you were surrounded by such caring and practical love during that heart-rending season. And now, as you return once again, may the re-telling of this story give you a fierce hope that you will once again be upheld by the unbreakable bonds of friendship and God’s inescapable love.
Oh, we need these reminders so often, don’t we? I forget how much we need each other. How much God allows us to be the hands that bring the healing only Jesus can give. Thank you.
Thank you.
I have been coming to South East Asia during summer months for 10 years and still as an inner-city missionary pastor and up until a year ago thought I would continue bridging it all. This past year began the “big” transition at 61. My mother passed 16 months ago from Alzhiemers. I am here now on a longterm lease getting all documents together but one last move. I will know next month. Let go fully of the church I started and start again or still participate? I miss my mother – holding her warm-welcoming hand. I am aching for community but was aching for it before. The ache is just deeper. I miss my family. When i talk on the phone to friends or family I can almost forget I am here until we hang up. I check through the day for emails when I dreaded them before. Your story was comforting – a gift from God saying “I know.”
Thank you for the “I know.”
Oh, this makes my heart happy. I love these moments of connection, of “me too” when God shows us that He sees us. I am praying that you feel such peace at that presence and guidance for what is ahead.
Oh, this makes my heart happy. I love these moments of connection, of “me too” when God shows us that He sees us. I am praying that you feel such peace at that presence and guidance for what is ahead.
What a beautiful reminder of God’s love for us. His love is constant and unchanging. Hearing your story of friendship and how distance can never separates us is so very true. I know my bestie is with the Lord now and I can hardly wait to see her one day. I write her letters and even email her as if she was still here. All of these things helps me to cope with the truth of knowing that she will never answer me or no longer will I hear her voice. And in a sense it helps me in this healing process of grief. I am looking forward to the day when I can see her again and I am hoping she will be right there in the front holding a sign welcoming me home. Thanks so much for sharing.
Oh, what bonds our sisters in Christ give us that cannot be broken. I am so glad you knew this and pray God will give you healing as well as the ability to pour into others with this kind of love.
Nicole,
Jesus commands to care for one another. Hebrews 10: 24 And let us watch out for one another to provoke love and good works. Jesus modeled compassion & caring for us. Following His model I care for people. God gave me the gift of encouragement & love. It looks different in each situation. For my aging parents I gave up a good job & helped them through their medical issues. Even took time to cook some for them. Now I cook for my aging in-laws & call them often to see how they are doing. I visited them several times in hospital & updated the family. Several times I get food together for my elderly neighbor living alone. I call, text or email friends & get a few gifts now & then. These are just a few ways I show God’s love to people in my sphere. It is so easy to show love & caring for others. So great that you had a good friend who help model Christ’s friendship.
Blessings 🙂
Beth, it is wonderful that you show love in these practical ways. You’re right – it’s simple to show love. But I am not sure it’s so easy, rather it is easy to get caught up in the daily things of life instead. It sounds like you have a wonderful gift of hospitality and much to teach others. I am in a season of wanting to lay down some things for family as well. I am clinging to Jesus’ model as well. Life is truly about the relationships that flow out of our love for God as we follow him. Grace and peace to you and those you care for!
How beautiful!