I stared at my black patent leather shoes, shiny next to the faded tile floor.

“Today, ask someone to be your friend,” the pastor said during the children’s sermon. “It will make your heart feel good to have a new friend.”

So I asked her if she would be my friend. And she said no.

The sting of that six-year-old rejection still manifests in a 34-year-old heart. It stifles my confidence, steals my joy, and coats me in fear and ugly thoughts.

They don’t need me to be their friend. They have everything all together and when they find out what a mess I am, they’ll laugh at me. They’re already laughing at me when I’m not around. I bet they’re texting each other in a new thread that I’m not on. Why did she ‘like’ HER post but not mine? I’m not cool enough to be her friend. We’re too different to be friends. I don’t need more friends.

The enemy is hard at work in the lives of women and their friendships.

But we can defeat him. He has already been defeated! And that means defeated in every way — the big things, the little things, and everything in between.

It’s up to us to harness the love of God and share it with the people we encounter as we let Him splash life into our friendships.

Your friendships matter — to God, to your life, to our hearts.

At (in)courage, friendships are kind of our jam. We’ve spent years telling you our stories and listening to yours. We’ve laughed and cried over cupcakes and coffee. We’ve shared videos from across the globe, finding the common threads and themes that bind our hearts and transcend community boundaries.

And now, you can hold all of this in your hands.

Arriving on January 10th, meet the first (in)courage book! Craving Connection: 30 Challenges for Real-Life Engagement is all the conversations about community that we’ve had over the years, gathered up between two covers.

Every (in)RL meetup. Every blog post. Every book club. Every pretty picture on Instagram. Each and every bit of it, plus 30 of our writers best real-life stories, practical tips, and ever-encouraging words in one beautiful book, which you can preorder now!

And friends. You’re going to want to do just that because in true (in)courage fashion, there are some incredibly beautiful gifts included for you and your friends. Books, necklaces, coloring sheets, gift tags and more — all items to help you live into the purpose of this book before you even read it! All the details are on the book’s site, but this is the first {and most amazing} of the preorder deals:

Basically, if you preorder a copy for yourself by December 15th, we’re going to send you another copy of Craving Connection, a gorgeous necklace set, gift tags, and coloring pages. I mean. Amazing, right?

Friends, this book? It’s for you, in the very same way (in)courage is for you. A place where you’re welcome, just as you are. Where we can all come together, kick up our feet and talk friendship — the good, the painful, the funny, and the just plain hard. Where we come away feeling refreshed, our cravings for connections satiated, and our hearts ready to pour out love.

No matter how many times you’ve chased after friendship and been denied, rejected, turned down, or even told ‘no’, there is hope.

Really big hope, the only kind that won’t disappoint because it stems from His great love. So let’s crave together, led by the One who instilled us with a longing for connection. For more about Craving Connection, watch this video:

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