We’re so excited to feature our dear friend, and long-time (in)courage community sister Stacey Thacker today. She and Brooke McGlothlin have co-written a beautiful book called Hope for the Weary Mom: Let God Meet You in the Mess. A new edition of the book was recently released, and we know you’ll be encouraged and inspired as Stacey shares a friendship story from “Hope.”
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“When Others Are Drawn into Your Story”
“Friendship . . . is born at the moment when one man says to another, “What! You too? I thought that no one but myself.” —C.S. Lewis
Another thing happened when I raised my little white flag from the messy depths of my heart. I found out that to my surprise, I was not the only mom who felt this way. Time and time again other moms have said, “What! You too?” As much as I wanted to run back into hiding when my friend stopped me at church, I realized that by saying it out loud, I may have sounded a trumpet call for other moms who felt the same way to join me in the journey from weariness to hope. Was it possible that in telling my story, other moms might see themselves too?
My fear has always been tied to the illusion that other moms have it all together and I don’t. I have hidden for years because I was afraid that they would not understand my broken places. As it turns out, I was hiding from women who felt just like me. They were not judging me. They were simply busy hiding in their messy kitchens, probably thinking I was judging them, too. Truthfully, what we really needed was an invitation to be drawn into one another’s stories and the chance to say, “We are more alike than we know. I know your story. I’m living it too.”
The Art of Clumping
Do you know the game Clump? It is like hide and go seek, except one person is doing the hiding and everyone else is searching. When a seeker finds the one hiding she join her. In the end, you are all in one big clump, laughing together. I like to think of Hope for The Weary Mom as just that. We are all hiding in the middle of our own messes. Wouldn’t it be more fun if we were in it together? What if instead of hiding alone we clumped?
The truth is, what we really need is Jesus. But He knows, more than we do, that we were made to live in community. He has always been a fan of the buddy system. After all, didn’t Adam have Eve? Naomi had Ruth, and David have Jonathan? He never planned on us living a hope-filled life alone. His design was that we would walk with others for a lifetime.
But sometimes life gets busy with diapers and chores and getting through the day and we forget what we were made for. We forget our design. We don’t even realize we miss it until one day we are alone and desperate for just one person to know our hearts. What do we do when we are ready to clump and find a few friends to tell our stories to and find encouragement for our most weary days?
Ask God to bring a friend into your life. Ask Him to build your own clump.
We don’t know how or when God will bring this about for you. But we are believing with you that God will begin to build a community of other moms in your life. Why? We have seen Him do that in our own lives. We’ve lived weary and alone, and we’ve seen the fruit that comes from trusting God and sharing our lives with others who understand. God has a plan, and he rarely works on our timetable. Building deep community takes time. But the good news is, you can start now keeping in mind this one truth: “Friends don’t complete us. Friends complement us. Only God can fill you heart with Hope. True friends will point you to Him.”
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Stacey Thacker is a wife and the mother of four vibrant girls. She is a writer and speaker who loves God’s Word. Her passion is to connect with women and encourage them in their walks with God. Her latest book, Hope for the Weary Mom: Let God Meet You in the Mess (co-authored with Brooke McGlothlin) is available wherever books are sold. You can find her blogging at staceythacker.com and hanging out on Twitter or Instagram.
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