The shape looked different than my normal lipsticks. It pointed toward the tip and sloped in the middle. Somehow on this quiet Sunday morning where thy busyness of a typical morning routine fell absent, I noticed my go-to autumn colored lipstick tip.
As I continued with my make-up routine, I mused over those old teeny bopper magazines I used to giggle over with my girlfriends. We’d sit on our hot pink covered beds as we smacked and popped even hotter pink bubble gum while reading articles that grabbed our attention: What The Shape Of Your Lipstick Says About You.
As if our lipsticks were oracles providing clues to our personalities, we would stare and compare the shape to the icons on the pages of the magazine. Rounded tip: easy going and loving. Diagonal: ambition and passionate. Flat: honest and super sweet.
What if I’m not any of these types?
What if I’m all of these types?
Those were days of discovery. Days of insecurity and comparison. Days of trial and error. Those were teen-age defined days not much different than my mid-thirties days. I stood in front of the mirror with bits of gray at my over grown roots and laugh lines revealing years of smiles. A good thing. That pointed tip, sloped-in-the-middle lipstick revealed to me that I am still that same giggly girl with her friends examining just who she is…even at the age of 34.
New roles defining my time and heart.
Rejection and heartbreak etching out ugly parts of my heart.
That etching––hard lessons on Jesus-dependence.
Open-ness to new experiences.
Who am I? What defines me? What doesn’t define me? These questions reveal that though we have a few years under our belts, days of discovery, insecurity and comparison and days of trial and error come our way no matter our present life season or decade. But a more important question comes to mind…
How do we go about navigating the questions of ‘who am I?’ along our journey through the decades?
This Psalm sits on my tender heart like a warm cozy blanket on a winter morning. Every passage in this holy book of poems and songs reminds me to point my intention and worship back to the One who answers my questions of discovery and journey. One particular verse catches my attention with a beautiful word picture to put me in the right frame of heart and mind:
I am pleading with the Eternal for this one thing, my soul’s desire: To live with Him all of my days — in the shadow of His temple, To behold His beauty and ponder His way in the company of His people. (Psalm 27:4 The Voice)
I find contentment and peace as it all boils down to my soul’s desire: to dwell and abide with my Lord. As I behold His beauty around me the answers I’m searching for stand small in the shadow of His greatness and Kingdom. For each of us in our various decades and seasons, His purpose and plan unfolds in precious, unique ways.
Let us seek God’s presence which stands mighty in every square inch of our life.
Let us dwell on His goodness rather than focusing on our lack.
Let us cling to Jesus who, at the cross, put to death the mistakes and sin of our past which plague us in the present.
Let us behold His beauty and allow Him to catch our daily attention and focus amidst our seeking questions.