When I was a little girl, I thought adults had it made. They could stay up as late as they want, eat what they wanted, talk on the phone whenever they wanted (hey, I thought that was important when I was little), and go out with friends on a whim.
Ah, the Good Life.
Somehow, the life that I now have as an adult is not quite the one of my childhood imaginings. Don’t get me wrong, I love being a wife and a mom, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything. But stay up late? I’m exhausted by 9 pm. Eat whatever I want? Sure, if I was twenty years old. Talk on the phone? Well, ok, but please don’t mind the screaming in the background and the interruptions every thirty seconds. And go out with friends? Give me a few weeks while I line up the sitter, make the plans, get the friends together and……hey, where are you going?
Time. It gets harder and harder to find. And I’m finding that as I get older, it’s more elusive than ever to find that time to connect – with girlfriends, specifically. Does anyone else have this problem? I don’t have less of a need for girlfriends, but I do have less time to devote in cultivating them.
As a result, so often we as women are just lonely. We want someone who gets us, someone who can help us resist that fourth cookie, who can go shopping with us and tell us not to get the jeggings, but the cute pink tunic would be really great.
Or maybe that’s just me. Please, someone, tell me not to buy the jeggings.
I think that’s another post.
When was the last time you connected with a girlfriend? No, I mean really connected? Not just superficial conversation, but what-is-your-biggest-burden-right-now-friend conversation? How-can I-pray-for-you conversation? This is what we need, it’s what we were created for, and it’s what we long for. I’m convinced that the majority of women I see daily, whether it’s in my neighborhood or at the grocery store, are just lonely and longing for deep, meaningful connections.
“As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” Proverbs 27:17
Women need friendships. We need to cultivate, strengthen, and deepen our relationships with other women. Here are a few simple ways I’ve come up with to bless my friends – the married ones, the single ones, and the widowed ones. Try one, and then share one of your own. Sharpen me, please!
- Every woman wants to feel loved and celebrated on her birthday. Acknowledge your friends birthday, but go beyond a phone call. It can be as simple as picking up Chick-Fil-A and some balloons and dropping by her house for an unexpected birthday lunch. Or grab her favorite dessert and stop by. But make the effort. I promise it will bless her.
- Make an extra batch of something you are really good at – cinnamon rolls or muffins or an apple pie – and surprise her with it, just because she is the kind of friend you can call at midnight when you need to talk. OR because you want to be that kind of friend.
- Pay attention to what your friend is struggling with. Then pick up a book, or a pack of pretty cards, or grab your kids and make some soap – but whatever you choose to do, package it up with pretty ribbon, and include a note that you are praying for that specific need. It may brighten her whole week.
It’s hard to feel lonely when you are reaching out and blessing others.
As I sit here writing this, I have an extra batch of cinnamon rolls in the oven with a specific friend in mind. My husband just glanced my way and gave me a wink. My kids are laughing and happy and in desperate need of a bath.
Ah, the Good Life.
By Megan, LifesongLeave a Comment