If you were to meet me in person, I might hug your neck, shake your hand, tell you my name is Amber. You’ve heard the name before. She was one of the girls before Jenny on Forrest Gump, on stage, naked behind a guitar. She was the name on the spine of one of my Grandmother’s books, Forever Amber – a prostitute, an Amber scandalously ascending in society with her sexuality and reckless survival skills.
She is me, too … abortion, affair girl. She was me, a jewel, her ways set as in stone.
But my first name is Mary. My Mother’s Mama is Mary, carelessly hilarious, a sharp red head buried under grey. And my Daddy’s Mama, too, was Mary, a steady churn for biscuits, babies, honesty, and laughter. I wanted to keep their name instead of making my maiden name as my middle name when I became a Haines.
And now the name is more than that, especially as I battle a sometimes consuming fear of who I used to be. Now I am Mary, the one delivered from seven indwellers, the one to whom Jesus appeared, the one who goes with Him, wants to wrap Him in spices. She is the one who says, “I have seen the LORD!”
Or she is Mary, Martha’s sister, who knows the One Thing, who doesn’t worry, only listens. She is Mary who anoints, who puts her chest to the ground in unabashed purity, who touches His skin. Emotional Mary, she cries till her hair is wet and can think of nothing greater than to be at Jesus’ feet pouring out her very best.
A lot comes with every name given to us and every name we call ourselves.
What are the names you believe for yourself? Have you yet assumed Righteousness of God in Christ? If Jesus were to have named you at your birth (new birth), what do you think the name would be?
By Amber Haines, The Run Amuck
Leave a Comment
Jessica says
Hey Lady. My name means God Beholds, and I can think of no better name …. He was with me in the miry pit of my past as Jessica and at my new birth, I was the same
Jessica ,only delivered …. I believe this name for myself. I am in His hands.
Amber Haines says
Don’t you think it’s so important to remember our names, to remind ourselves often? Beautiful, Jessica.
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Lindsay @ Not2Us.net says
When he gave me new life, he didn’t change my first name. He changed my last name. He made me a part of his family, and he made me Lindsay IAM. This is how I described it a while back, when he first revealed my new name to me:
“In the middle of it all, is the One. His Name is I AM. She is his daughter and his bride. She takes His Name as her own. She trades her connections to this world in order to be identified as one of His. Everything in her life flows from Him. He is the center of it all, and her life flows out of who He is, who He was, and who He will always be. ”
Praise God, the Giver of New Names. 🙂
Amber Haines says
Wow. That’s kind of the best last name I’ve ever heard. Thank you for sharing, Lindsay.
Holley Gerth says
“She was me, a jewel, her ways set in stone.” And now, Mary Haines, you are Mary who “treasures (isn’t that like a jewel too?) all these things and ponders them in her heart” then gives them back to God and those in your life and us on these pages–beautiful offering of grace. Loving much and loved much.
Amber Haines says
Thank you, sweet friend.
Elora says
My name? It means Victorious One & God’s Gracious Gift. My mom wrote me a letter once when I was in 8th grade with the meaning etched on flowered paper. I have the letter – and the verses corresponding with the meanings – to this day.
Also, I set out to find my new names in Christ a couple years ago. As I was driving the truth hit me square in the knower. “You are my Speaker of Truth,” He said.
And so I do.
Amber Haines says
Yes you do, Elora. There’s freedom in it, too, living out the name.
Melinda says
One of the meanings of my name is: Grateful. Now if that isn’t absolutely perfect! In Greek it means: One Who Is Gentle. Great topic. Definitely food for thought!
Amber Haines says
Oh to live out that name! Thanks for sharing, Gentle Melinda.
Rachel says
My name? Rachel. Lamb. It’s the one God gave me before I was born, and the one that only God can help me to live up to now.
I was supposed to be Amy, until my daddy changed it the day before I was born. He wanted to name me after Rachel in the Bible – you know, the one that Jacob worked for 14 years just so he could marry her. The one that was so incredibly loved. My daddy wanted my husband to love me like that.
Now, I am married, and am loved like that. Not only by my husband, but by God himself. But. But, I strive every day to be worthy of that love. I know that I’ll be loved regardless, but to be worthy of it, that’s an incredible thing.
Amber Haines says
The way Jacob loved Rachel just kills me. It’s beautiful. To live up to the LOVE, yes, that is an incredible thing.
Donna says
I’m Grace. Because He is a gracious God I’m saved. Eph. 2; 8,9 He speaks to me all the time about grace to be sure I don’t fear or feel guilty. And one of my favorite quotes is from Adrian Rogers “Grace is an ocean and we are minnows worrying it’s going to dry up.” I need grace every day.
Amber Haines says
Me too, Donna. You can’t be too big for Grace.
Mary Joy @Seeds of Encouragement Sewn with Grace says
Tears streamed down my face as I read your words…I am so glad that you found your home in Him! Isn’t it amazing how He heals all of our wounds from our past and gives us grace to live a life for Him as our present and future?
My name is Mary. My husband began calling me Mary Joy when we met and he began courting me. Mary Joy is a name that I love! It fills me with pleasure to think of being Mary filled with His Joy.
Thank you for sharing your story!
Mary Joy
Amber Haines says
I LOVE YOUR NAME, too, Mary Joy. Thank you.
I Live in an Antbed says
My parents named me Anne Victoria (Grace is the Victory). I haven’t always understood His Grace, but He is gently revealing more and more those fathomless depths.
Amber Haines says
Anne Victory, how beautiful a name – the only way to win.
abbyleigh says
abigail means joy. leigh comes from my grandfather, and not my favorite one. i was supposed to be a boy – tyler, i think. i need the joy and the mixed feelings to meet and mingle, and find their authentic name, in the giver of names. i like to think he calls me by a name i can’t translate yet . . . but i know it when i hear it.
Amber Haines says
Me too, Abby. I often think about His giving us new names when our faith comes to completion in Him, when we don’t have to see through a mirror dimly anymore. We’ll see face to face, and then He’ll say it, and we will know.
Goose bumps!
Craig says
So yesterday you reminded me of my mom, and how I stole her towel folding trick to have a little bit of her with me.
Her name is Mary too.
Maybe just coincidence.
Your tilted halo is pointing me true north.
God Bless Mary Amber Child of God Haines
Amber Haines says
Thank you, Craig, brother.
Prudence says
I am Mary, forgiven of my grievous sins. Mary touched and comforted by Jesus. I want to be Mary, sitter and listener. Too often I am not that Mary.
Amber Haines says
Yeah, there’s a Martha in me, too. I have to tell her to sit her fanny down, to be still and know.
Laura@Life Overseas says
I love the truth in Revelation where it talks of Jesus giving us a white rock, with a new name on it. Maybe a name for just me and Him. A name that will perfectly define me, because only He perfectly knows me. A name that will speak power and beauty and intimacy. A name that will be this perfect image of what He had in mind when He formed me in the first place.
That’s a name that speaks the most hope to me.
Thanks for this well-written, thought-provoking post. Loved it.
Amber Haines says
Thank you, Laura. It’s just crazy cool that we know how the story ends and that the ending is really just the beginning. The everafter is eternal. I’m only Amber a little while.
My four year tells me often that we are not real. Only GOd and Jesus are real. I love that.
Jeri @godsdreamsforme says
My name is He who refreshes others. It’s been that way all my life. Trick is, I need let his refreshing into my life everyday in order to live that name out 😀
Amber Haines says
That’s right. Broken vessels have to be filled constantly – always pouring out. Thank you, Jeri.
Kelly Langner Sauer says
*giggle* I just left a comment about identity at your blog, and then I find you here… Wow.
I am learning. Learning slow to accept it, setting aside the Law to live in Jesus’ righteous. My name is Kelly Anne, bold warrior, bearing grace. How do my names fit together? I don’t know most days, but they fit me, fit the person I am, the woman He’s called to Him. I am not always brave enough to accept them. But I am trying lately. It is good.
Amber Haines says
What a name! Bold Warrior, Bearing Grace. That is Christ.
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Marie-Ange says
Hey Amber!
I love your thought! My name is Marie-Ange….like “Mary” and “angel” but in French that sounds Marie-Ange.
I love what you said about Mary and the meaninig of this name. I can’t wait what my new name will be in heaven!
Love,
Marie-Ange.
misty says
i love this post. it reminds me of my husband who has only ever been rickey to me, but grew up by his shortened name rick. his father was the first rickey and no one, even his mama, wanted to confuse the babe for the monster. but when my husband got saved he chose to reclaim the legacy of the father, to allow Father to replace father, to allow grace into a name he grew up fearing and hating. i think it’s a beautiful story of redemption. like another kind of mary-name.
Rachel Boldman says
My name is Rachel. Little Lamb. I hated my name for a long time, because who wants to be named after a farm animal? But then, when I was a senior in High School, I had to analyze this poem, and ironically at the same time was singing the words set to music in my voice lessons. And then my name came to mean SO MUCH to me.
“The Lamb” by William Blake
Little Lamb, who made thee?
Dost thou know who made thee?
Gave thee life, and bid thee feed,
By the stream and o’er the mead;
Gave thee clothing of delight,
Softest clothing, woolly, bright;
Gave thee such a tender voice,
Making all the vales rejoice?
Little Lamb, who made thee?
Dost thou know who made thee?
Little Lamb, I’ll tell thee,
Little Lamb, I’ll tell thee.
He is called by thy name,
For He calls Himself a Lamb.
He is meek, and He is mild;
He became a little child.
I a child, and thou a lamb,
We are called by His name.
Little Lamb, God bless thee!
Little Lamb, God bless thee!
So my NEW name is the same name, the name the Lord audibly told my mother I would be. It just means something new to me.
Anneliese says
I love reading everyone’s new names that the Lord has given them!
Earlier on this year, a friend of my very best friend/sister in Christ told me that my name means ‘consecrated to God’. Then a few months later, I was reading the book of Exodus and found this verse: “Then the Lord said to Moses, ‘Dedicate to Me every firstborn among the Israelites. The first offspring to be born, of both humans and animals, belongs to Me.'” (Exodus 13:1-2)
I thought this was pretty cool, actually, because I’m the oldest of 2 sisters!
And then God gave me another name not long ago: Mother of Many. I can’t wait to see what God will do with that!
May the Lord bless you.
Aimee says
Aimee Beth. Aimee/Amy = Beloved. I just saw that my spelling means “Beloved Friend” in French. Beth = God Is My Oath (Which I never knew. Wow.)
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