Panic coursed through my veins. And that’s no surprise; it’s one of the scariest situations a human can live through:
The first lunch period at a new school. In fourth grade.
I thought I was going to be in the clear. You see, my new teacher, Mrs. Berkowski, had assigned me a “buddy” for my first week so I could learn what to do in this new and strange school, meet some people, and feel a little less awkward. (When, really, aren’t fourth graders primarily made up of awkward?)
As I grabbed my Happy Days lunchbox with The Fonz giving me his double thumbs up, I started to follow my teacher-assigned buddy, Valerie, and her group of giggly friends to the outside lunch tables.
Once she realized I was following her (maybe a little too closely), Valerie turned around, blocked my path, and said, “You’re not sitting with us. I only have to be your buddy during class.”
I am still convinced, to this day, that there is nothing that can hurt a soul more than cutting words from a nine-year-old.
So, The Fonz and I went to sit at an empty metal table so I could eat my PB&J and sliced carrot sticks without bothering anyone else. I understood my place, and it was alone.
I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes. I hung my head and bit the inside of my cheeks to keep from crying in this new place. I didn’t want anyone to see me break down. It would just be one more reason to not belong.
Hunched over my lunch, trying to become as small as I possibly could, I didn’t notice a girl walk up to my side, but I did hear the words, “You can sit at my table.”
And that’s when I had to keep from crying again — this time from relief. I gathered up my food and carton of milk, and The Fonz and I joined Brooke and one of her friends. For the rest of the lunch period I hardly talked. I was just so grateful to be sitting at the table with other people instead of alone.
And now, any time someone:
- asks me and my husband out for lunch after church
- brings a meal to our house when one of us is sick
- sets up a coffee date
- shares the eggs their chickens laid
- invites me over for dinner,
I remember that feeling.
The feeling of not being alone anymore.
The feeling of “come sit at my table.”
The feeling of moving from “weird new kid” to “part of the gang.”
The feeling of belonging.
What my fourth-grade little heart longed for, and what my grown-up self recognizes now, is that my friend Brooke embodied the words of Jesus in Matthew 25:35–40 (NIV):
“‘For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’
Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’
The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’”
That simple invitation to “come sit at my table” changed more than just a lunch period. It changed my understanding of kindness, connection, and the profound role that simply sharing a meal plays in our lives. It reminded me that even the smallest gestures, like offering a seat or sharing food, can have a life-changing impact.
It did for me.
Food has always been more than sustenance; it’s a universal language of love and community. When we break bread together, we nourish not just our bodies but our souls. Every shared meal becomes an opportunity to say, “You are seen, you are valued, you belong.”
In a world where loneliness often whispers in the quiet moments, extending a hand — and a meal — can turn isolation into togetherness. Let’s be the ones who scooch over and make room at our tables, the ones who see those sitting alone and say, “Come, sit at my table.” Because when we do, we meet a double need: we feed the hunger and form the connection.
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If you’re looking for a way to easily love the people around you with nourishing food, plus incorporate meaningful rest into your life while taking care of your future self, order Kathi’s new cookbook, Sabbath Soup: Weekly Menus and Rhythms to Make Space for a Day of Rest.
Sabbath Soup would make a great Christmas gift for all the women on your list. The book includes over 100 recipes (not all of them soup), reflective prayers, and strategies to take a day of rest every week.
When you order before October 12, you’ll also receive access to Kathi’s “Sabbath Soup Shortcuts” to help you get dinner on the table with a lot less effort. Redeem Your Preorder Here.
Place your order to get your freebies. . . AND also enter to WIN one of five copies that we’re giving away*! Leave a comment on this post telling us about your favorite way to spend your Sabbath or invite someone to your table and be entered to win.
Then be SURE to tune in to the (in)courage podcast this weekend for a heartening conversation with Becky Keife and Kathi Lipp, all about real hospitality and more. Listen in on your favorite podcast app!
*Giveaway open to US addresses only and will close at 11:59 pm central on 10/13/24.
Leave a Comment
Pam Seipp says
Spending time with God and my family, I celebrate Sabbath with reading, cooking, walking, and feeding animals on our ranch.
Kathi says
Sounds about perfect.
Tamara says
oh how cutting words from a child to another child can be, how wonderful kindness from one child to another can be! I LOVE soup! That is my go to in the cold month of the MidWest. God bless you Kathi and the release of your book!
Kathi says
Tamara – you are so right, and so kind.
Sharon A says
I love spending time with God in prayer and studying the Word. There is something healing in soup. Thanks for sharing your story. God bless you.
Kathi Lipp says
I so agree. Soup heals!
KathleenB says
One of our favorite Sabbath gatherings after worship is bringing our very hardworking niece and husband, along with their four children around our table to rest, relax, and soak up our hospitality to reenergize them for the new week ahead. What joy to our hearts!
Kathi Lipp says
What a gift you are to that family Kathleen!
Terry says
For many years I would have a roast in the oven and prepped veggies ready to go when we left the house for church on Sundays. My father-in-law would join us or other extended family members. It is a cherished memory.
Lisa Wilt says
Kathi,
I shared this post and I follow you on Instagram as I cook and gather loved ones around my table!
Sending you autumn joy,
Lisa Wilt
Kathi Lipp says
I love that Lisa! Happy Fall to you!
Kathi McNair says
Good morning! Thank you for your encouraging devotional this morning. I’m wondering how many people in your church or other churches (The readers of this comment) actually reach out to people in your community that have intellectual or physical disabilities? I know the majority of churches across the United States don’t do this and this is the perfect opportunity to really reach a large population of unreached people group by your kindness and your sharing and your invitation and transportation to church. Most of them have no access to social media, live in poverty, have no way to get to church or church events, and are very lonely. I encourage you to find someone in a group home or someone in your neighborhood or a family that is struggling with the difficulties of raising someone with autism and invite them to be part of your church community. They are often overlooked and yet Jesus’ heart is with them .
Kathi Lipp says
Kathi, this is such a great reminder. Our church has a very active community when it comes to supporting those with Autism and their families. For anyone who is interested in the subject and wants to help, I love Diane Kim’s book Unbroken Faith https://www.dianedokkokim.com/unbroken-faith/
Rachel Pratt says
Kathi, I just finished reading one of your other books. This post was so encouraging… Especially to someone who gets super intimidated about inviting people over. You framed it in such a different way. Thank you! This helps me have more courage to reach out and gather in!
Kathi Lipp says
Rachel – this comment made my day. I’m praying for courage for you as you reach out!
Elaine Pool says
When our kids were at home, we always had Sunday lunch, often feeding one of their friends with us – especially when there were youth there w/out their parents. I’m a sucker for the lonely-looking ones!
Kathi Lipp says
I bet there are a lot of grown-up kids who remember your table with love.
Jane says
Food is such a great connector and way to meet friends, we’re sitting at a table at a church potluck and meeting. New friends are sharing joys and sorrows with a good friend. I love recipe books, so this sounds like a great one for adding our Lord into, the connection with friends. It would make a great gift maybe even one to myself. (Are there vegetarian recipes in it?)
Wanda says
I feel the Lord has been laying on my heart sharing baked breads with others. Recently made 2 loaves of banana bread and took to an assisted living home where a former teacher was now living. It was so fun and they loved the bread giving me feedback on which recipe was the best. Today I baked my first sourdough bread and delivered to friends with a scripture, Jesus’ I am the bread of life statement. Absolutely love sharing and baking foods for others
Brenda M Russell says
Thank you for offering me a seat at your table. It is very nice to meet new friends. I look forward to the new Fall Season with its pretty colors and brisk breezes.
I enjoy watching the Holiday Baking shows on the Food Network. I can’t bake and I don’t do fancy cooking. My grandmother was a great cook but she wanted me to be a great student at school.
It seems that some people were born with extra hospitality and they move around the kitchen with ease. I can take meals to the sick and I can purchase food for the pantry but if someone has to be entertained at my house, I would be very nervous. I don’t buy food that is pretty and tastes great. Smile.
I will just make phone calls and send text messages and do errands to help others.
Thank you for understanding.
Brenda
Kathi Lipp says
Brenda – I 100% define hospitality as all those things that you described. Bringing food to those who need it. And sometimes, going to someone’s home is an extra burden. Delivered food is a gift to someone who is in the thick of a crisis our just having a hard day.
Sandra says
So very true. I’ve lost my husband/best friend to death recently & the greatest gifts I’ve received are: ‘Heat your oven. We’re bringing pizza to bake & a salad for dinner to eat with you tomorrow’ or ‘Let’s eat lunch together at the park & then walk& talk.’ Inexpensive but share foods & time with others to fill loneliness. I’ve been blessed by neighbors & Christian Friends. It means so much during this period of my journey & not having any family.
Courtney Humble says
I like to spend the Sabbath connecting with God and honestly just relaxing, wherever it be a nap or watching a TV show/movie, etc.
Areum Lee says
What a beautiful devotion! Years ago when I was going through my divorce, I remember a meal being delivered to me and my girls from our new church. I never experienced anything like it.
I joined the cooking team so I could be part of blessing others. There is something about receiving a homemade meal – Jesus sees you!
During COVID my friends and I formed a new team since the church shut down and we still cook and deliver homemade meals to people on our prayer lists.
Come sit at my table ❤️
Sharon says
My specialty is one on one lunches where i make homemade smoothie bowls for my friends, relax & enjoy time together.
Stephanie L. says
As an introvert, it’s easy for me to stay home alone. But like every human, God created me to need connection. So periodically, I invite a friend or family over for dinner. It’s extra work, but it’s worth it. ❤️
Lori from PA/LLR says
KINDNESS COUNTS! Let’s “all be the SUNSHINE” in the lives of others. Can you imagine if everyone give kindness to others, in our thoughts, love, and deeds, how much better our world would be? Thanks for sharing! Let your Light SHINE, Matthew 5:16.
Chrissy Jenkins says
My fave Sabbath practice is morning yoga followed by lectio divina and Scripture/prayer journaling.
Bonnie says
I was the new kid in 3rd grade. We’d only moved across town but it was like a whole other culture from the school I had left. On the playground before the bell rang, twin sisters approached and asked if I wanted to play with them. Then at lunch they asked me to sit with them and even offered to share the fresh baked cookies their mom had sent in their lunches. We’re all rapidly approaching 60 and we’re still friends. I live near an elementary school and always think of them and their kindness on the first day of school. When my kids were still in school I always packed extra in their lunches in case there was an opportunity to share. You can’t always pay someone back for their kindness but you can always pay it forward.
Judyc says
Once a month our church has potluck after morning worship service. I love this time of visiting with friends, and I don’t have to get my house ready for company or make sure that the dishes I take all “go together “. There is always plenty of food, and it’s a great time of getting to know some of those that leave church quickly on regular Sundays. I truly believe sharing a meal is one of God’s wonderful gifts to us!
Kathi Lipp says
This sounds so lovely and welcoming. I love it!
Ruth Daniels says
Wow! I’ve never thought about a meal being so relational. I must reframe my thinking of a shared meal from being just another task to meaningful connection. Thank you for such insight.
Erica S says
I love to find out where people are from or grew up and ask them their favorite recipes. We come together and share food from our culture !
Karen Halter-Wood says
Kathi your words are so encouraging … I have experienced the ups and downs of cooking for many and now for only two. My husband and I wanted to start Sunday soup day to invite our friends and family to stop by for a cup of soup so we could connect with them. I will be purchasing your book to help make this happen! Love all your ideas and prayers .
Nadine says
I would enjoy winning a copy of this book. Thank you for the podcast.
Kristi says
We have a bachelor neighbor that we’ve invited to holiday meals with us for probably about 15 years. Also, an elderly neighbor with no family came sometimes. One Easter, when a couple of my children were away at college and wouldn’t be with us, I made sure we had plenty of food and looked around at church for people to invite for dinner that day. Two single mothers and their children joined us and we had a wonderful time! I don’t consider myself a great hostess, but have found that people just enjoy being included.
Brittany Wolske says
My favorite way to spend my Sabbath is after church gathering at my in-laws house for Sunday lunch and an afternoon of relaxing, football, puzzles, pool time, and always tons of conversations. Since joining my husband’s family 10 years ago, it’s grown to be something Iook forward to weekly.
Asiza Sandoval says
I have a big table and love gather around it with friends and family to share real. Once a month I invite a small group of ladies o er for tea, treats, a discussion around scripture, (currently Proverbs 31) and prayer
The wisdom, laundry tears sjated around this table fill me with sucj awe for the grace and goodness of God. A copy of your book would bless my gatherings immensely!
Pam says
This resonated with me on so many levels. I was that new girl, but in fifth grade, and you never forget that feeling! Thanks for the encouragement to scootch over (love that word!) to make room for someone. It makes all the difference!