It’s easy to walk into a room and bring with me whatever it is that I’m thinking about. I can carry in joy on a sunny day because I’ve been driving with the windows down and my favorite tunes have been playing on my way to wherever I’m going. I can just as easily carry darkness and frustration if somebody cut me off or my air conditioning wasn’t working or someone said something to me that got me in a weird headspace.

We are real people full of real feelings and while that isn’t a bad thing in and of itself, I think sometimes I let my feelings get a hold of me in a way that I might reconsider if I actually took the time to be considerate.

Years ago, I was on a call with some colleagues and one of them posed this very important question that I haven’t been able to get out of my head ever since: What is it like to be on the receiving end of me?

You see, when I walk into a room and I bring all of my feelings, good, bad, or ugly, I’m not often asking that question. I’m not considering the fact that perhaps someone is having a bad day and I am making it worse by telling them how amazing things are going for me. I’m also not considering that perhaps someone is having a wonderful day and I’m about to bring them down by pointing out everything that’s going wrong. While our feelings are fleeting and we don’t have to let them totally control us, they still do have a way of coloring the world around us, don’t they?

On a podcast I was listening to today, the host brought up the fact that songs that are sad stream at much higher rates most likely because sad songs get listened to on repeat in a way that happy ones do not. When we are feeling big and challenging emotions, we tend to pull out our standby sad playlists and lean in hard to process.

Let’s be honest: there is something deep in our being that wants to amplify the emotions we are carrying. We want to nurture them and grow them. We don’t just want to be a little bit one way or the other, but we want to set a tone around us based on what we feel. If we are sad, the world is dark. If we are happy, the world is magic. No matter our state, the playlist must reflect it.

As a creative person, I understand this urge completely. I understand the desire that we have to live a life that feels authentic to our experience with depth and meaning. But sometimes, we don’t think about the collateral damage that our search for meaning may be creating. What if, while we are creating worlds in our mind of the perceived reality that we are walking through on a daily basis, we are actually inviting others into something that is not for their good? What if we are, in reality, encouraging cynicism or hopelessness or, to be fair, encouraging a fake happiness or pretend way about us that ignores the gravity of a situation?

When we engage with our friends, neighbors, or family members, we are not only bringing ourselves to the table, but also the messages that we are telling ourselves, the feelings we are cultivating, and the playlists we have curated that set the tone for each interaction. When I walk into a room and I have been festering in my bitterness, it not only affects my own heart but it actually could potentially infect someone else’s. Yes, we are all responsible for our own feelings and reactions and responses, but as sisters, we also belong to one another.

The Bible tells us in Ephesians 4 that we are members of one body and that even though we have different parts, we all come together for one purpose. I wonder what would happen if we saw our entrance into each situation or conversation or space as an opportunity to invite others toward goodness and beauty and Truth. What if we saw each connection point with another human as a way of existing honestly while also seeking out the best in others?

Friend, we do not walk into our days from a place of total neutrality. Everything that we do will do one of four things: it will exhort, explain, expose, or exploit. We can use our presence and our words to encourage someone and cheer them toward the truth. We can use our wisdom to help others understand something that perhaps they did not know about before. We can bring to light realities that may have gone hidden without their unveiling. And we can also manipulate, slander, and pull people apart in ways that are not healthy.

Psalm 139 talks about being so very honest with God that you’re willing to have him check your work, so to speak. The psalmist writes, “See if there is any offensive way in me!” Can you imagine that level of being known and called out?

And it doesn’t stop there. The next line is, “…and lead me in the way everlasting.” One translation (NCV) says, “Lead me on the road to everlasting life.”

We are at an intersection of life and circumstances, friend. And we’re sitting here, tunes blaring and heart pounding and shouting the lyrics of the songs we choose and we have a big choice to make: Will I use my words and my presence to build or to destroy? Will I explain or expose or exploit or exhort?

Here’s hoping we pause long enough to invite God to lead us on the road to everlasting life.

Listen to today’s devotion below or wherever you stream podcasts.

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