We are the moms who hug, dance, and snuggle. We are the moms who get overwhelmed, whose snarls sometimes come easier than our smiles. We are the moms who live in the push-pull of exhaustion and joy, in the tumultuous world of feelings and giving all of ourselves.
We are the moms who pray our children will fly while a tiny part of our heart grieves their flight from us, because we are the moms who love those children with every fiber of our being. We’re not sure where they end and we begin, but we know we didn’t begin until they arrived.
We are the moms who work around the clock in a million different ways. Praying. Cooking. Cleaning up. Carpooling to school and dropping off at daycare. Guiding. Loving, always loving. Scolding and worrying. Kissing boo-boos and wiping tears. Breathing deep, in and out, over and over. Chasing their feet and their hearts. Answering emails in the middle of the night. Pulling them back and drawing them in and sending them out. Scrubbing toilets and remembering details and packing lunches and signing papers and pouring out.
We are the moms who love children we didn’t birth. We are the neighbors, aunties, sisters, friends, and church grandmas who love these kids as though they’re our own. We snuggle up to beloved little ones during the sermon at church and pass them hard candies to squelch the wiggles. We attend birthday parties and graduations and weddings, bearing gifts for these dear hearts, setting up tables and making food, and then cleaning up at the end of the day. We rock little babies and help big kids pack for college, tearing up at the thought of them driving away. We light up when our phone dings with a text from a precious high schooler. We read stories and sing songs and carefully choose cards to pop in the mail for every holiday.
We are the moms who haven’t had a night out in ages, and who crave one like oxygen. Who run on grace and caffeine. Who build a meal off of the scraps pilfered from kids’ plates. Who go through more coffee shop drive-thrus than we care to admit. Who are exhausted from being “on” all day at work, and coming home to be “on” longer still.
We are the moms who drive through McDonald’s for milk because we ran out and just cannot drag ourselves into the actual grocery store. Who pay for a latte in change dug out from between the minivan seats. Who cannot make it to church without bickering with our family on the drive. Who are consistently seven minutes late to every appointment. Who perpetually lose socks to the washing machine, and have been known to purchase new underwear instead of washing the pairs we already own. Who take our alone time seriously and guard it fiercely — just like we do our kids.
We are the moms who long for more. More grace. More patience. More coffee. More time (always more time). More space in home and heart. More money. More sleep. More Christ in us. More life in our days. More quiet.
At the same time, we are the moms who long for less. Less laundry. Less fighting. Less yelling. Less clutter. Less selfishness. Less guilt. Less busy. Less stuff. Less dust. Less hustle.
We are the moms who sit in the hallway in tears during bedtime, drained. The moms who sit in empty houses in tears because there are no more babies to tuck in at bedtime. We are the moms who ache for those we’ve lost, for those we’ve wanted, for those we’ve asked for, for those we’ve begged God about and bruised our knees over in earnest prayer. For the babies we couldn’t carry. For the children we’ve lost to heaven and red tape. For the grown children we couldn’t hold on to as they flew our coop to make their lives. For waywards and prodigals and could’ve-beens.
We love this life even when we don’t like it. We love these kids with all of our beings — even when we may not like them very much. We thank God for the gift of love He gives in the form of sticky hands, flown coops, late nights, early mornings, birthday celebrations, cards in the mail, trips to see each other, texts sent, calls placed, and prayers whispered.
We are these moms, and God is for us all.
As Mother’s Day approaches, we know that it is a complex day full of many emotions and experiences. Know that at (in)courage, we are praying for each of you in this season as you remember, celebrate, grieve, or enjoy motherhood and what it means to you. Every single woman who loves, encourages, and nurtures those who become part of the next generation is doing amazing work and is to be celebrated.
Above is an excerpt from our book, A Mother’s Love: Celebrating Every Kind of Mom by Anna E. Rendell, which is full of reflections on God’s heart. Featuring unique and diverse stories from the (in)courage community, A Mother’s Love offers heartfelt encouragement to all kinds of moms, whether they’re a mother in a traditional sense, a spiritual mother, or a mother-like figure who breaks the mold. This book is sure to help any woman share a meaningful gift with someone who has been impactful in her life, a new mom learning the ropes, or a close loved one facing the joys and challenges of any stage and type of motherhood.
Compiled with all women in mind so we can celebrate those who made us, shaped us, helped us grow, and loved us well, A Mother’s Love is a beautiful gift for the moms in your life.
Oh my word! I’m sobbing. This was so beautiful. What more can I say except thank you and blessings to all.
I agree with Madeline absolutely beautiful words for for everyone we are all moms whether they are our children or others. we all have love to give to and offer. May we do so freely!
Too beautiful, so touching and so true! Only a mother can understand a mother. There is no love like a mother’s love!
Blessings and gratitude! ❤️
Dear Anna……..Really liked your story, but I am a 76 year old women and I thought and did the things you wrote about many years ago. I loved my son with all my heart and we did many things together, but after 50 years of marriage, my husband started with dementia and I tried to help him for 3 and a half years, but he would not follow the neurologists things he needed to do. He started drinking even more and getting more violent. He never took the meds and flushed them down the toilet. Mother’s Day is very painful for me. My Mother is gone and my son told me I was lying about his father, but he never came to see us in over a year so there was no way he could even know what was going on. What I am getting to is my son called me and told me he did not consider me his mother anymore and he has not had any communication with me for 14 months and he will not let me see or talk to my 13 year old grandson. Last 4/20th, I finally was able to get through to 911 and as he was fighting with me to grab the phone he did not even recognize that the light on the phone was still on and the 911 person heard everything and taped it . The police were there in 5 minutes. They and his neurologists told me the next time he is probably going to kill you. You need to get him out of the house. It’s your safety you need to think about now, not your husband. The story goes on, but I will not bore you with it. Your story was beautiful. Thank you, Anna………………….Betsy Basile
Anna – I’ve had all those emotions. Motherhood is beautiful with a kaleidoscope of feelings and experiences. Thank you for your encouraging, heartfelt words.
Thank you for your inspiring words. This is my first Mother’s Day without my son. He passed away on 5/24/2023.
I continue to pray for Peace to accept it and also to be able to attend church with the other mothers on Mother’s Day.
Anna,
what a beautiful way to celebrate ALL women. We are all mothers in some way. We pour out to our families, work, volunteer & church. While I never had children I mothered my parents in their old age. I loved on & cared for two pet iguanas (Iggy & Tiny). Thank you for celebrating moms everywhere.
Blessings 🙂