I didn’t think I had an issue with identity.
I’ve always been a pretty self-assured person, confidently marching to the beat of my own awkward drum. In elementary school, I liked wearing dinosaur tennis shoes and a pink neon tank top. Later, I was one of those rare creatures who actually liked middle school. I liked learning and boys and playing the trumpet in band. And I was blissfully unaware of how greasy my bangs were.
Not that I was without insecurities. In high school, I worried my skin was too pasty and my zits too many. I worried about pleasing people and performing well. Even so, I more or less knew and loved who I was.
Entering young adulthood and now into my forties, I’ve been lucky never to have had a crisis of faith or identity – save for those early years of motherhood where I felt like my existence had been reduced to a butt wiper and milk machine. (Yes, I love my children and believe it’s a privilege to care for them. Some seasons are just extra hard.)
But when it comes to my core identity, I’ve always felt confident in who I am as a person loved by God and created in His image. Like, check. Got it. Thanks, God. I’m good.
So when I was recently sharing with a friend about a deep struggle I was having with body issues, I was surprised when she told me that her sense from the Lord was that my issue actually had nothing to do with weight or aging but with identity.
Huh?
It felt very much like my issue had to do with the thirty pounds I’d gained and my feelings about that.
But over the days and weeks that followed that conversation, I asked the Lord to show me if there was something to this identity stuff. Bit by bit, through a podcast here and a Scripture there, God started unfolding new pieces to the puzzle of my soul.
I knew I was saved by God, but I was beginning to grasp in a deeper way how much I was loved by God. I was starting to understand that the way I see myself directly impacts the way I see God.
It’s true: What we believe about ourselves directly impacts what we believe about God. Do you believe that? Here are just two examples of how this shakes out:
- If I believe I am ugly or stupid, then I also believe that God made a mistake in how he made me.
- If I believe I’m loved because of how I look or what I accomplish, then I also believe that God’s love is conditional and not enough for me.
See how that works?
We have to ask God to reveal to us false beliefs about ourselves that have, often unconsciously, taken root in our hearts. And then ask Him to help us exchange those false beliefs for His truth.
A couple of weeks ago, I asked God to speak into my identity, to show me who He says I am. This is what I felt prompted to write in my journal…
I am God’s daughter. The King’s daughter. The Princess has the King’s divine affection. She has unobstructed access to Her Father. She knows His power but she also knows His love — for her, for His people, for His kingdom. There is no length the King wouldn’t go to to rescue His daughter. All He has is available to her; it’s her future inheritance and her present access. Why would the King’s daughter suffer and struggle and strive alone when she has FULL access to her Father’s resources, riches, and influence? But most importantly, access to the King’s wisdom, counsel, and support!
The King’s daughter knows the privilege, joy, and responsibility of being in the Father’s family — a royal and set-apart people. She is constantly aware of her princess identity. She continually looks to her Father; she is secure in His approval and delight over her. Even if everyone in the kingdom disagrees with or devalues her, the King’s blessing is all she needs.
Yes, His crown of blessing marks her identity. She is a beloved daughter — precious and protected — but she is also a royal warrior.
She holds the King’s shield and sword. She is marked by His seal. She wears His full armor. She is a formidable force against the enemy. No harm will come to her as the King and His powerful army stand with and around her. She never fights alone. Yes, she never even sleeps alone — her Father’s soldiers are always standing guard. What a miracle to be the King’s daughter.
That is who I am.
Friend, that is who you are too! If you’ve accepted Jesus as your Lord and Savior then you are a co-heir with Christ, an adopted daughter of the Most High King! Don’t just read those words. Let them really sink in. You have access to all that Jesus is and all that He has.
And above all, you are so, so loved.
“I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people, and his incomparably great power for us who believe.”
Ephesians 1:18-19 NIV
Need more help seeing yourself the way God sees you? Subscribe to Becky’s new podcast, Hope and Reason, where you’ll hear real stories of God’s real impact on our lives and be reminded of how deeply you are loved.
What a coincidence that lately I’ve thought about how I dishonor God by criticizing myself and focusing only my short comings. I am trying to deepen my relationship with God. I am making a conscious decision to read my Bible, and pray. And graciously remember I am a child of God, and God doesn’t make mistakes. Thank you for sharing this today.
Madeline, you are a child of God! Indeed, He doesn’t make mistakes. Rest in that truth today. I’m so glad you’re here.
Becky – your journal entry is one I need to keep and read frequently. I struggle to see myself this way even though I know it’s true. Thanks for sharing this!
Lynne, I’m so glad this was timely and encouraging for you. Keep asking God to give you His eyes to see who you really are. He is faithful to do it!
Becky, I love what you wrote in your journal, especially the part about being a royal warrior. It is a message many of us need to take to heart. I want to put this where I can re-read it daily! Thank you!
Judy, I’m so glad this spoke to you! Yes, we are all royal warriors! May we know who we are so we can live worthy of our calling!
This article perfectly describes me, and is helping to shift my thinking into how God sees me.
Thank You for addressing this , it opens up a whole new path of thinking. I know I am a work in progress.
So beautiful, Julie. Thank you for being open to God’s continuing work in your life.
Yes, a miracle indeed \0/
….just printed out what you wrote in your journal and sending it to my daughter, my granddaughters and any sister God asks me to send it to!
Thank you Becky
Oh, that made my day, Janet!
I had to be told by our last Salvation Army Officer I was Daughter of the king. I wouldn’t have many friends. The friends I have I hardly ever see. The two sisters saved live 86 miles away from me. They are so good to me. They one sister on behalf of both of them keep in touch with me. Asking how I am. They know I suffer morning seizures now and then not that often without anything warring. So as they can pray for me. They use to live not far from me when Parents alive. My other Friend she busy. I see not that often. But I love the way they care for me. Like Jesus does and for us all like the kids song I think is so true for all of us. That I was taught at Sunday School when a child. It is “Jesus Loves all the Children Of The World Red And Yellow Black And White” how true that is. Love today’s reading Becky. Love Dawn Ferguson-Little Enniskillen Co.Fermanagh xx
Thank you for being here, Dawn! You are a treasure.
Becky,
Such needed words. Society tries to tell us how we should look & act. God sees us as a beloved daughter. I’ve heard that since we were made in image of God when you criticize yourself in any way you are calling Jesus the same thing. He calls us beautiful. We may not always feel pretty, but take a look deep in your heart & see what Jesus sees. Thank you for a great thought provoking post!
Blessings 🙂
I agree with what you have said , but I think god also entrusts us with taking care of the precious life, body, he has given us.
Absolutely! I fully agree with you. But it’s an issue of stewardship and not performance or acceptance.