Every day in December is jam-packed with stuff — just like my fridge. The constant ding of my phone is like its own version of “Carol of the Bells.” The month has just begun, and I am already exhausted. Yet, there is a yearning inside of me to not miss the true meaning of Christmas.
I find myself struck by many feelings. December feels so nostalgic. The warmth of memories and traditions wrapping me like a favorite worn sweater. Yet a quiet sadness also settles in like a fog — comforting, yet solemn. I sting for all that was and all that has been lost. A loneliness rises within me.
Christmas also ushers in shame. Shame for all I have not accomplished or overcome this year. Shame that, in many ways, I remain the same. Even after all the work, struggle, and uphill battles, I still argue with those I love, can not keep up with everyday demands, and hate myself for all that I can’t seem to overcome. My will to “keep going” takes more power to muster up than ever before.
Then there is my guilt. It is my cold companion. I feel the aching need to hide how I am really doing for fear that if someone knew my secrets, my guilt would grow. In the midst of sorrow, shame, and fear lives a tingling hope. A hope that this year will be different. This year, I want to savor the true meaning of the season.
How do we savor the Savior this Christmas?
Three temptations will knock at our doors this month. They will beckon us, call out to us, and continually try to steal our hope. You will be tempted to fill, cover, and hide.
We will be tempted to fill our loneliness with more food, more drinks, more entertainment, and more stuff. This temptation is so alluring. We so badly don’t want to feel our groaning loneliness that we will fill ourselves until we are nearly sick. Instead of putting more and more in your mouth, in your eyes, through your ears, what if you let your loneliness breathe? In honesty, confess the true condition of your heart. Let your longing to be loved in the deep places of your heart be known. Instead of reaching for more, reflect on the goodness of God.
We will also be tempted to cover ourselves with our own glory. Shame isn’t that we have done something bad, but that we believe we are bad. We have a stain that we can’t get out so we must cover ourselves up. We cover ourselves with fashionable clothes, nicer things, bigger homes, fancier parties, brighter Christmas trees, or anything that will convince people that we are better than we actually are. Instead of covering ourselves this Christmas, let’s bring our shame to Christ. Take your mask off and confess the things you wish weren’t true about yourself. Confess. Let us confess our sins to one another. Instead of seeking our own glory, let’s shift from dwelling on our own goodness to the goodness of God.
Lastly, we will be tempted to get rid of our guilt. Our guilt tempts us to hide. We want to retreat from telling the truth. We hide behind our good behavior and good deeds. Or we hide in the darkness of our sin or brokenness. Darkness feels safe. We tend to hide ourselves in the deepest corners of our own souls. But what if we receive Christ this Christmas instead?
Jesus came to us. He lowered Himself and came into our world, but He also continues to come into the caves we often hide ourselves away in. Christ came to lift us out of our guilt. He came to pour light into the darkness.
The Christmas cure is to let the love of Christ fill your loneliness, cover your shame, and come into your guilt. You are free. Instead of reaching to resolve your pain on your own, receive the gift God is offering you through His son.
I refuse to miss the meaning of Christmas this year.
So, even today, I reflect on the goodness of Christ who came to save and love me. I receive the invitation to feast at the table of hope God is offering me. I remove the layers and layers I have worn as a way to cover my bad from others. Instead, I put on the robe of royalty that God offers me through Christ. I am called a daughter of the king. I am of royal blood. I receive the light of Christ that came into this dark world. The light comes into all the places I have hidden for fear of judgment. Instead, Christ stood in my place. He took the punishment for me. I can stand freely as one who is forgiven.
There will be temptations this season, but there will also be a cure. Christ is the cure. In Him, I pray we find our hope.
Madeline says
I thought about embracing this Christmas season with joy. And life happened. I am trying hard to remember what Christmas is all about. But the distractions of hearing about a friend’s diagnosis, the passing of a long time member and friend from church, heating bills, my slow recovery from minor surgery, making plans to travel to see my daughter for Christmas, etc. Takes my breath away. The one thing that got me out of my funk for a few hours was attending Sunday service. The message of God’s love lightened the load. I need to focus and keep that in mind.
Barbara says
Wow so good, love your insights! The part where you said we need to bring our shame to God instead of giving in to the temptation to cover ourselves with our own glory, really spoke to me.
Jill says
These are extremely powerful words. May we all reflect on this post today and feel the season’s hope.
Cheyla says
OMG Anjuli! I can’t even adequately express how much your post meant to me. I have so many negative thoughts that are constantly swirling in my head, most of which you pinpointed so well. I try to counter them with God’s word, but it’s exhausting and I have such a tough time believing anything good about myself. Your post gives me hope, thank you!!
Phyl says
Thank You for such a powerful and thought-provoking message today. What an honest reminder of how we treat ourselves, and then how we can use God’s power of love and acceptance to free ourselves from shame, guilt, and all the others evils that we allow the world to make us focus on. When will we accept that being a child of God makes us ‘enough’? That His love is more than ‘enough’?
Brenda M. Russell says
Oh how profound this article is to me. I didn’t know how to label this 43 years of being married and not really embracing the true meaning of Christmas. My three daughters are all young adults now. I remember the joy that filled our home as they waited to open their gifts. They also opened my gifts from coworkers and wrapped them back up for me.
I was never in a hurry to open my gifts. Now I know why. I was feeling emotional about my past childhood experiences. And now at 64, I don’t have to hold on to those feelings.
I can cast all my cares on Jesus because He cares for me and He will never leave or forsake me.
With Gratitude,
Brenda
A Beloved Daughter of God
BC from BC says
Thank you for this beautiful reminder that we are loved by our Creator, Our Lord, Forgiver and Friend. I am God’s Girl no matter what. Even when we feel unloved. I am grateful for the Peace and Hope that comes from having God in my life. Pray for all those that are struggling, I pray you will feel wrapped up in His Peace and comfort.
Cheryl says
Well written from the heart . Yes , I hear and agree . Thankyou for reminding me – I AM a Child of the King and this Christmas Season I want to sing praises and relax in his loving peaceful arms . Victory over the rush and turmoil of gifts and running .
Merry Christmas dear sister
Cindy says
Thank you for this Anjuli! God bless you & your family. Am also sharing this with a good friend who is not a believer yet, who’s fighting breast cancer to recovery, and pray Jesus gift of love touches her heart, her mind,..
Merry Christmas
Beth Williams says
Anjuli,
The Christmas season can be hard on many. There is so much to do like parties, cooking, baking, gift buying, etc. We can get easily distracted from the true meaning of Christmas. It takes intentionality to erase society’s version of Christmas. For me that looks like buying gifts for senior citizens-showing those less fortunate the love of God. Also listening to good Christmas music like Go Fish’s “It’s about the Cross” and “It’s called Christmas with a Capital C” another favorite song is Matthew West’s “Leaving Heaven”. One big tradition we have is watching Charlie Brown Christmas.
Let’s remember that Christmas is Jesus Christ’s Birthday.
Blessings 🙂
Tess Isaacson says
These words really hit home with me . Thank you for sharing and expressing what I too feel at times. Peace be with us all.