My anxiety was higher than the piles of unfolded laundry waiting for me back home. I sat in my car with my hand on my rounded stomach. The doctor’s words still echoed in my ear, “Abnormal ultrasound… amniocentesis… she may not survive.” The darkness of fear rushed in where there was once anticipation and joy. I was now in a season of uncertainty and the stakes were high. I searched for the words to pray, but all I could muster up was “God, where are you?”

How do you continue to pray in seasons when unsure if God is listening?

By God’s grace, I can tell you — 25 years later — that my baby was fine. Thank You, Lord! But the happy ending didn’t change my in-the-moment wrestling. When dark circumstances loom heavy or shadows of doubt and discouragement hang over our souls, prayer can feel like the last thing we want to do. Yes, we want God to fix our problems, but it can be hard to pray when He feels so far away.

For times like these, I want to share some encouragement from Matthew: Pray Like This, my new six-week Bible study about Jesus’ teaching on prayer.

1. Cling to the Promise of the “With-Ness” of God

In one of my favorite poetic parallels in Scripture, the Gospel writer Matthew, a Jewish tax collector who left behind his former life to become a disciple, opens and ends his messianic telling of Jesus’ story with two powerful verses that remind me and you of the “with-ness” of God:

“Look! The virgin will conceive a child! She will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel, which means ‘God is with us.'”
Matthew 1:23 NLT

“Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”
Matthew 28:20 NLT

There’s something so beautiful about starting and ending that Gospel with Jesus’ declaration of God’s never-ending presence in our lives. Here is how I sum up the with-ness of God in the Matthew study:

God is with you in times of questioning.

God is with you even when you feel alone.

God is with you when life is at its highest tension.

God is with you when you’re at your lowest point.

God is with you when you make mistakes.

God is with you when you take big steps of courage or faith.

Fill in the blank: God is with me when _________________________________.

The notion of “God with us” means that we have unshakeable awareness and access to His permanent presence. This anchors us in the hope that we need to stead our souls when the storms of life seem to draw out God’s voice. We can trust He is still there!

2. When Your Prayers Are Focused on God, You Will Experience Connection with God

In his award-winning song, “Need a Favor,” country artist Jelly Roll writes about how he only talks to God when he needs a favor. He’s not the only one. God knows we’ve treated prayer like a vending machine or customer service line when we’re upset with life, so we tell God what we want Him to fix. In my life, I’ve sadly used prayer like Amazon Prime. When something is wrong, I will pray and then get impatient because God didn’t send the answer to my prayer in a day or two. Years ago, I found an anonymous quote challenging my prayer mindset: “Many seek the hand of God, but few seek His face.” I was challenged to reconsider my “me-first” prayer mindset.

This is why Jesus’ teaching on prayer doesn’t start with a focus on us; instead, we begin with a focus on God:

“Pray like this: Our Father in heaven, may your name be kept holy.”
Matthew 6:9 NLT

When we approach God as the One who is with us and the One who loves us as a Perfect Father, that knowledge puts our problems in perspective.

One of the key experiences in the Matthew: Pray Like This study is the “God-Centering” exercise, which teaches you to begin your prayers with a bigger view of God.

• God IS – Getting clear on God’s character and communicating His nature to us.
• God HAS – The ability to recount God’s faithfulness in humanity and our lives.
• God CAN – Articulating your understanding of God’s power and sovereignty.
• God WILL – Rooting yourself in God’s promises, His eternal plan, and living out our purpose.

Beginning your prayers focused on God creates a sense of safety for your hearts and bodies. You are reminded that God is your refuge or safe place. Here’s an a-ha moment I had years ago in a long season when I was impatient for God to answer my prayer: The more we center our prayers around a big God, the more we realize our prayers and our fears are already addressed and answered by who God is.

Have your prayers been more about your problems or centered on God lately? God is a big God, my dear friend. Don’t stop praying. If you’ve been out of practice on starting your prayers centered on God, this is a great season to make this your focus. Yes, keep telling God about your problems because He cares about you. But start with God in prayer, and He will give you peace, hope, and unshakeable confidence in Him, no matter what you are facing today.

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Barb’s new six-week Bible study, Matthew: Pray Like This, is a deep-dive study on experiencing transformative prayer and knowing the joy of praying like Jesus. When you pray like Jesus, you will learn more about God’s character and His eternal plan and purpose for you. Along the way, you’ll learn that prayer is the place where God meets you with His heart set on conversation and time spent with you.

Pick up your copy today. . . and enter to WIN a copy right here! We’re so excited to give away FIVE copies of Barb’s new study. Just leave a comment, and you’ll be entered to win*.

Then be sure to tune into the (in)courage podcast this weekend for a conversation with Barb and Becky! Trust us, you do not want to miss this episode!

*Giveaway open to US addresses only and closes at 11:59 pm central on 3/30/25.

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