I am coming up on my ten-year anniversary of being a follower of Jesus Christ. What most people do not know about me is that the same anniversary marks my ten-year anniversary of being off of narcotics.
I quit getting high about a week before I surrendered my life to the Lord. In the last few months, I have found my thoughts wondering back to the day where I could escape from reality by using substances. I found myself thinking a little too fondly of those days and keeping it a secret, which scared me. A lot.
I finally spoke the words to my husband because I wanted to break the power of my secret and now I realize that I really do not want to go back to those days. They were dark days. Satan surely does have a way of romanticizing sin though and making me forget about the tears.
You see, I have scars. We all do, don’t we? Some of our scars are visible from the outside. We get used to them and they just become part of our flesh. Some of them bother the heck out of us and we try to hide them from others. Some of those scars are unseen. They are the scars on our hearts. They are the scars we can battle on our own, or we can reach out and ask for help.
As a teenager, I was lonely, insecure, and very unsure of my value as a person. I didn’t know how to deal with those insecurities so I turned to the ways of the world to help me cope. In doing so, I dashed my little heart up even more.
In July of 2001, God revealed Himself to me in a mighty and powerful way. He offered me forgiveness and allowed me to see that although I was a very wounded and sinful human being, He still loved me more than I ever could have imagined and He wanted to do good things in my life. He wanted to do miracles in my life. God’s love has healed those scars so much, that most of the time I don’t even notice they are there anymore. I forget about them. Some times I catch a glimpse of them. I remember them and all the ugliness that surrounds their stories. And sometimes, I get new wounds.
The difference now though is that when the storms of life come, when I turn to my father in Heaven, I don’t feel the need to escape from reality. God’s love gives me strength and a confidence that I never could have imagined. He gives me the will and the desire to keep on going. He reminds me that He loves me with a love that is so huge and so encompassing that I don’t need to get high when everything around me seems to be spinning out of control. He gives me peace.
I am so thankful for the ways my father loves me. I am so thankful for the ways He is healing me and transforming me. I am so thankful for His spirit that is always with me and I am never alone.
Will you let Him heal your wounds, transform your life, and help you to handle even the hardest of days with a peace and joy that no drug could ever offer? I promise you, it will be the best decision you ever make in your life.
By Mindy Carlettini, Very Unfinished ProductLeave a Comment